We downloaded the Matt Hancock app so you don’t have to

The Tory MP Matt Hancock has invented the Official App for Matt Hancock.

Sign Up

Get the New Statesman\'s Morning Call email.

Human v-neck and tie Matt Hancock MP has decided to solve the Conservatives’ social media crisis with a genius new invention: the Official App for Matt Hancock.

Yes, this app (for 17+ users only, sorry kids) is being downloaded by fans of the Culture Secretary (ok, cynical journalists) everywhere today, in the MP’s bid to connect with voters in a younger, hipper way on their digital camera ApplePhone devices.

So your mole is giving it a whirl.

The welcome window. Self-explanatory, but also with no explanation of why the world needs a Matt Hancock app:

All photos: Matt Hancock app screenshots.

Like an excitable right-wing elf, the man himself pops up to introduce himself. “Hi, I’m Matt Hancock and welcome to my app!”

He tells us it’s “a chance to find out what’s going on both in my role as MP for West Suffolk and as Culture Secretary” and also “for you to tell me what you think and engage with others on issues that matter to you”.

Letting people tell you what they think? Brave. Hence the next screen warning that “offensive conduct will not be tolerated”:

As we wait for our favourite MP to hit the livestream, some “banter” plays out in the comments. There is, inevitably, a very active user with the username “Matt Handcock”.

He seems to be taking ages to come on, so I browse the “Have Your Say” timeline, which is a far safer space than the livestream comments. A flood of very sincere messages from genuine Hancock fans flows in...

There’s also a Library…

With an Instagram-style Gallery!

Pretty neat, eh?

Review: 8/10. Points docked for lack of promised live-streaming.

Hank us up on Have Your Say with your own feedback. Meanwhile, your mole is deleting all its other social media accounts and keeping its snout out for the new cryptocurrency Hancoin.

I'm a mole, innit.

Free trial CSS