Alan Sugar genuinely believes Taylor Swift has a swastika tattoo on her cheek

They didn’t have spoofs like these in the age of Amstrad.

NS

Sign Up

Get the New Statesman's Morning Call email.

The British entrepreneur who pioneered the revolutionary Pointing At Failed Businessmen management style, Alan Sugar, is flummoxed by Taylor Swift.

In the purest yer-dad-trying-to-use-technology moment, The Apprentice host quote-tweeted a piece by spoof news site The Onion, picturing a hammy photoshop of Taylor Swift bearing a swastika tattoo on her cheek.

“Taylor Swift Grateful Kanye West Controversy Taking Heat Off New Swastika Tattoo,” reads the satirical headline, referring to West’s declaration of love for Donald Trump on Twitter yesterday.

His Sugary Lordship’s response? “Eh I don’t get this. Can someone explain is she making a statement or what?”

There are so many things wrong with this response, your mole knows not where to start

First of all, he thinks it’s real. HE THINKS IT’S REAL. He thinks literally one of the most famous and successful popstars on the planet has had a literal Nazi symbol permanently etched on a whole half of her face.

I mean, I know Amstrad was a more basic time in computing, but come on, that is clearly a photoshop. Also, The Onion is a very well-known spoof site. Perhaps Siralun should devote more of his Twitter time to reading mildly amusing satire and less time abusing Piers Morgan.

But also, if we accept and move on from the fact that HE THINKS IT’S REAL for one second, his reaction is so low-key. He even says “Eh”. That’s basically “meh”.

Why is he so chilled out about a world-famous celebrity and popular role model bearing a swastika on her face? Why in the first time in social media’s history is he politely asking someone for an explanation instead of condemning her hideous actions?

Just why, Lord, why?

I'm a mole, innit.