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19 December 2012

SMF wins at Christmas cards

"Retiring Rudolph"

By Alex Hern

The winner of this year’s Christmas card competition (yes, there was a competition, didn’t you know?) is the Social Market Foundation, whose card is a perfect parody of their own reports. Click for a bigger version:

The text on the back says:

The debacle surrounding the refranchising of Santa’s West Coast Sleighline has thrown gift distribution policy into a snow flurry this Christmas.

Last month, Rudolph’s operation of the line came to an abrupt end, as purple-nosed reindeer Prancer was unexpectedly awarded the contract. But, as Rudolph languished in unseasonably bad-tempered retirement, the Partnership of Lapland Elves and Baubles (P.L.E.B.s) uncovered significant technical flaws in the bidding process, based on risky stocking capacity projections.

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In this year’s Christmas commission, the SMF research fairies propose a radical overhaul of the tendering process to ensure that such problems don’t snowball in future.

“This is virgin’ on the ridiculous. Unless we sort this thing out, next year there’ll be 12 drummers drumming before we get the gifts out.”
– The Ombusnowman

Sponsor: Virgin Mary

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