With mothers like this

To Houston, in honour of Patrick Swayze

Just in case you were getting excited, the only link between this post and the late, loved Patrick Swayze is Houston (he was born there). No extra Swayze info here, I'm afraid. (Although, saying that, I did particularly love this from Whoopi Goldberg on Swayze's passing: "I believe in Ghost's message, so he'll always be near.")

Anyway, reading this blog post from Gwen (of Gwen and Her Men fame) of the Houston Chronicle is physically painful. I imagine poor "Josh" whimpering in his bedroom in Houston as his mother strides around town . . . wait for it . . . trying to find him a date for the prom.

"What about that one girl . . ." I start. I mean a girl that I saw at his eleventh-grade orientation last year. She'd passed us in the hall and had seemed really sweet and cute and smart to me. Totally high-school-girlfriend-worthy. Not to get all gross and Oedipal here, but she'd looked like a nicer, more well-adjusted version of me at that age. When I saw her, I immediately pointed her out to my son. "Look at that girl! She's cute! You should date her," I'd said at the time.

Oh GOD.

And then:

Josh is a handsome boy. I'm not just saying that because I'm his mother -- I've had it confirmed by independent sources, and I've seen the looks that junior high girls give him at the mall. He's tall and he lifts weights in his room at night, when he thinks we won't notice. And he's a snazzy dresser, thanks to my guidance.

Gwen, do you realise what you are doing? There is a picture on your blog. This will mean your son's friends will identify you as his mother. This will mean that he will be mercilessly taunted for the rest of his days. Not finding a prom date will be the least of his worries. And stop dressing the poor boy, for heaven's sake. You use the word "snazzy". This means, by definition, that letting you anywhere near the wardrobe of a 17-year-old boy is going to result in some kind of fashion crime. Gwen, leave him be. And stop watching him weight-lift. Seriously.

Sophie Elmhirst is features editor of the New Statesman

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Why isn't Labour putting forward Corbynite candidates?

Despite his successes as a candidate, the organisational victories have gone the way of Corbyn's opponents. 

The contest changes, but the result remains the same: Jeremy Corbyn’s preferred candidate defeated in a parliamentary selection. Afzhal Khan is Labour’s candidate in the Manchester Gorton by-election and the overwhelming favourite to be the seat’s next MP.

Although Khan, an MEP, was one of  the minority of Labour’s European MPs to dissent from a letter from the European parliamentary Labour party calling for Jeremy Corbyn to go in the summer of 2016, he backed Andy Burnham and Tom Watson in 2015, and it is widely believed, fairly or unfairly, that Khan had, as one local activist put it, “the brains to know which way the wind was blowing” rather than being a pukka Corbynite.

For the leader’s office, it was a double defeat;  their preferred candidate, Sam Wheeler, was kept off the longlist, when the party’s Corbynsceptics allied with the party’s BAME leadership to draw up an all ethnic minority shortlist, and Yasmine Dar, their back-up option, was narrowly defeated by Khan among members in Manchester Gorton.

But even when the leadership has got its preferred candidate to the contest, they have been defeated. That even happened in Copeland, where the shortlist was drawn up by Corbynites and designed to advantage Rachel Holliday, the leader’s office preferred candidate.

Why does the Labour left keep losing? Supporters combination of bad luck and bad decisions for the defeat.

In Oldham West, where Michael Meacher, a committed supporter of Jeremy Corbyn’s, was succeeded by Jim McMahon, who voted for Liz Kendall, McMahon was seen to be so far ahead that they had no credible chance of stopping him. Rosena Allin-Khan was a near-perfect candidate to hold the seat of Tooting: a doctor at the local hospital, the seat’s largest employer, with links to both the Polish and Pakistani communities that make up the seat’s biggest minority blocs.  Gillian Troughton, who won the Copeland selection, is a respected local councillor.

But the leadership has also made bad decisions, some claim.  The failure to get a candidate in Manchester Gorton was particularly egregious, as one trade unionist puts it: “We all knew that Gerald was not going to make it [until 2020], they had a local boy with good connections to the trade unions, that contest should have been theirs for the taking”. Instead, they lost control of the selection panel because Jeremy Corbyn missed an NEC meeting – the NEC is hung at present as the Corbynsceptics sacrificed their majority of one to retain the chair – and with it their best chance of taking the seat.

Others close to the leadership point out that for the first year of Corbyn’s leadership, the leader’s office was more preoccupied with the struggle for survival than it was with getting more of its people in. Decisions in by-elections were taken on the hop and often in a way that led to problems later down the line. It made sense to keep Mo Azam, from the party’s left, off the shortlist in Oldham West when Labour MPs were worried for their own seats and about the Ukip effect if Labour selected a minority candidate. But that enraged the party’s minority politicians and led directly to the all-ethnic-minority shortlist in Manchester Gorton.

They also point out that the party's councillor base, from where many candidates are drawn, is still largely Corbynsceptic, though they hope that this will change in the next round of local government selections. (Councillors must go through a reselection process at every election.)

But the biggest shift has very little to do with the Labour leadership. The big victories for the Labour left in internal battles under Ed Miliband were the result of Unite and the GMB working together. Now they are, for various reasons, at odds and the GMB has proven significantly better at working shortlists and campaigning for its members to become MPs.  That helps Corbynsceptics. “The reason why so many of the unions supported Jeremy the first time,” one senior Corbynite argues, “Is they wanted to move the Labour party a little bit to the left. They didn’t want a socialist transformation of the Labour party. And actually if you look at the people getting selected they are not Corbynites, but they are not Blairites either, and that’s what the unions wanted.”

Regardless of why, it means that, two years into Corbyn’s leadership, the Labour left finds itself smaller in parliament than it was at the beginning.  

Stephen Bush is special correspondent at the New Statesman. His daily briefing, Morning Call, provides a quick and essential guide to British politics.