Racism and Lewis Hamilton

It's hard to think of any racists who aren't pathetic physical and mental specimens, proving beyond

There has been some more furore about Spanish racism towards Lewis Hamilton. I hate racism and everyone in Spain is racist and so I hate them all. Which isn't racist, because the Spanish are not a race. What I am is xenophobic and generalising and wrong.

But not as stupid and wrong as ALL Spanish people. All right, let’s be fair – SOME Spanish people.

The recent Spanish stupidity has meant though that the papers have reprinted this unbelievable picture of some Spanish people cleverly mocking Hamilton with a sophisticated satire.

It not only confounds me that anyone could be allowed to do such a thing and not be stopped by the people around them, but it also demonstrates how stupid racists are. In fact it's hard to think of any racists who aren't pathetic physical and mental specimens, proving beyond doubt that the idea of white supremacy is bogus. They prove the opposite of what they believe just by their own existence.

I mean, look at that picture and consider what must have gone through these Spanish idiots' heads. "Hey, I hate Lewis Hamilton. How can we satirise him?"

"Hmmm, hang on, he is a black man. Why don't we dress up as black people, by painting our faces, but nothing else including our necks, black? That will show him!"

"But how will he know who we are meant to be?"

"Let's all wear T-shirts that say "Hamilton's Family" on them."

"Yeah, brilliant. But let's make sure that they look pathetically home made and that we spell family with two l's"

"Yes. But what will be saying exactly by doing this?"

"We'll be saying that Lewis Hamilton is black and so are his family. That will show him."

"Is that really enough? I mean surely he would know that he is black and in any case, isn't his mother white?"

"You're right, it's not enough. For the satire to work and to make him, not us, look stupid, we'll have to put some real effort into the costumes. All the money we have saved on T-shirts and an English dictionary we can spend on getting some authentic wigs to give us the appearance of black people. Now what kind of wigs should we get?"

"Let's get a load of grey wigs. That's the kind of hair that black people have. They all have grey hair."

"Yes, brilliant. That will show him. We will have successfully satirised him then. It will be like him looking in a mirror and seeing his family staring back at him."

"Oh wait and let's get some thick spectacles as well...."

"Why?"

"Because it will make Hamilton look stupid. Not us. Him."

What is truly incredible about this is not just that they thought this was a good idea, but not one single idiot amongst them was a clever enough idiot just to take one step up the ladder of idiocy and say, "For our brilliant joke to work,shouldn't we really at least get some big, black Afro wigs so we look like we're in the Jackson 5. Rather than these grey ones, which are a bit confusing to be honest. Are we just saying that all Hamilton's family are old?"

"Not just old. They have very bad eye sight too."

"Do they? I mean if we want to be racist and funny, surely we have to do a bit better. I mean, for example, we could wear monkey masks, implying that black people are monkeys, rather than just implying black people are black.... with grey hair.... and bad eyesight. Which I don't think I've ever heard anyone say."

"No, no. Just painting our faces black is a much better satire. Lewis Hamilton is going to look like a right prick now. Don't forget we've got "Hamilton's Familly" written on our T shirts. We're really showing the world who the worst fucking idiots in the world are."

"Hamilton and his "familly"?"

"Yes, exactly. I can't wait to see the photos of this. We are going to look brilliant."

The fact that I, a non-racist, can immediately think of "better" racist jokes to make, shows how ignorant and pathetic all racists are. They are a subclass of morons and I really think the world would be a better place if we could gather all the people who are stupid enough to think that their race is superior to any of the others and make them go and live on an island somewhere. Entertainingly there would be racists of every different colour on this new Eden and they'd have to fight things out between them. Whilst the rest of us, who don't think that just having a different coloured skin to someone else is worth remarking on can get on with trying to resolve more important issues.

My favourite racists though are the people who use religious justifications for their bigotry. They believe that God, despite creating all peoples, actually favours their race above the other ones. They essentially think that God is racist, which is quite an insult. That he created all the different people, but they are the ones that he actually likes and supports. Or maybe they believe that different gods created the different races, each preferring their own kind, all in competition with each other. Yet the gods all managed to put aside their differences for long enough to agree to design a basic template so that each separate race of human beings would be sexually compatible with the others and genetically almost entirely identical.

Anyone who thinks that any all powerful all-seeing God would be petty and pathetic enough to prefer one race or nation above all the others is a fucking idiot, as ridiculous as these fools in their misspelled T-shirts. Really it should be enough to make them realise that gods were created by different races and nations as talismans rather than the other way round.

Don't use an imaginary man in the sky to justify your own stupidity. And if you think that the colour of someone's skin, or their hair or their eyes or where they live is an indication that they are inferior to you, then alas it is you who is the inferior one. And so you should dress up as a poor satire of yourself, wearing a T-shirt saying "I am mee".

But then after Hamilton’s incredible and mesmerizing victory I saw that my anger was not justified. When Hamilton's family came out to congratulate him, it turned out they had ridiculous grey hair, comedy thick glasses and some kind of skin pigment condition where their faces and nothing else were black as boot polish. They were also wearing home-made, mis-spelt T-shirts saying "Hamilton's Familly" and waving their arms around in a stupid fashion.

Those people in the crowd in Spain hadn't been racists at all, merely impressionists and they had got the Hamilton familly off to a tee. How could I have judged them and their country so unfairly. There’s a lesson for us all there. Somewhere.

31 comments

gnuneo's picture

"It's not a coincidence that fascist regimes deal so badly with satire. Humour and common sense can deflate these fools in a second."

so i'm still interested in why my post got deleted? Did you do it yourself, Lee, or was it done by the editors?

evergrowingbrain's picture

I thought this was a superb article in every detail.

keep it up. the more we laugh in their stupid faces, the less power we have.

"ridiculus!" (swish flick)

evergrowingbrain's picture

or even - the less power they have.

i'll wake up later.

Richard Herring1's picture

I have no control over this website. So nothing to do with me or Stewart Lee.

gnuneo's picture

oh ok.

[removes the picture of Richard from the cauldron]

did you read it before they deleted it? *I* thought it was amusing anyway!

KimMelanson1990's picture

gnuneo: "It's not a coincidence that fascist regimes deal so badly with satire. Humour and common sense can deflate these fools in a second." - so i'm still interested in why my post got deleted.....

Uhh, its getting harder these days. NS doesn't even give one the courtesy of a notice that "this post was deleted" as the Guardian does. It just disappears forever. Thus 'freedom of speech' is ever more of an illusion here than elsewhere and respect for your efforts and interest is likewise wanting, gnuneo.

KimMelanson1990's picture

Richard Herring, thank you for your kind response. I agree with "standing up to these people" but racism is well entrenched around the world. As long as politicians are willing to manipulate people through their weaknesses and ignorance, it will always be an issue and a problem.

Although "humour and common sense can deflate these fools", as with 'gnuneo' I have found that it and truth are not always welcome on media blogs, even on NS. That, of course, is a problem with the pretentious perceptions of the moderator and how they wish to apply their rules.

Well, one good joke deserves anotther, eh? Yours was misconstrued - as you have apparently also misconstrued mine. Still, it is a good excuse to continue the conversation.

Now forget about Lewis Hamilton's dad and enjoy your weekend with this clip from a popular TV show of a supposedly fascist regime which obviously doesn't deal so badly with satire, etc after all http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_PNklpaJCA (Didem is actually an ethnic gypsy).

gnuneo's picture

the NS seems to go through phases, but its general direction is *definitely* in the wrong one. You would think that a publication noted for its defence of free speech for its own contributors, and Journalism in general, would slightly less limp-wristed in defence of free speech in general - even (or perhaps especially) criticism of itself.

alas, it is becoming a living monument to political censorship - even more than that required by our neo-totalitarian Govts anti-free speech restrictions on e-discussion - an example, just like China, of "democracy is OK until the powerful think it is not".

i expect this to disappear as well, just as so much other criticism of the NS has.

and as you say, they do not even have the honour and decency to leave a note to explain the reasons behind the deletion, which would not make it OK, but would at least give some justification.

Ann1's picture

You all miss the point. I have heard it so often, you
don't like me because I am coloured, well may be I
don't like you because you have a chip on your
shoulder. I hope you all realise in a free country one
should be able to express oneself. Is this fellow a
"good sport.".? I wonder...
Your comments on the Spanish people are quite
obnoxious, you should not throw stones when you live
in a glass house. Ann

Pekay's picture

Cut the bull ,Ann. The chip on the shoulder you talk about is often the consequence of the politics of racism. Let us not pretend to be ignorant of the fact that the one is often disrespected, and treated with contempt simply on the basis of skin colour and ethnicity. An aboriginal in Australia is treated like " the lowest of the low" and after too much of this treatment it is inevitable that one's soul gets destroyed.
Anyway Richard, what about some comment about the response from some newspaper editor in America who allowed a headline " Do we paint the White House black now". I would presume this person would have a certain level of intelligence, but obviously little self - respect . Forget those ignorant Spainards, let us express some real hatred for racism, and those that have access to some media outlet to promote it.

stevenlind821's picture

The Spanish people are just trying to boost their self esteem due to their inferiority complex.

Robert Powell's picture

No here I am. But fortunately I live a full and productive life these days - hence no time to waste on such frivolity. Still Richard I send you my best wishes. You are to comedy what George W was to politics - a woefully overpromoted frontman. How is Mr Lee?

Bogbrush's picture

What awful, feeble article this was. I've never heard of this "comic", but I'm now well warned to keep clear of him. I can't believe I wasted a few minutes reading this.

Spankabuttux's picture

I just had an anti-BNP post removed...

sweety's picture

I got censored here because, they probably did not understand the incident I referred to . I talked about this episode in India, last year, when a huge part of the stadium made monkey noises at a Black Person.
The BBC did not dwell too long on this!

Spankabuttux's picture

Haha! Bogbrush, please post for each article, there
are many of us who miss failed comedians who are
bitter about another's success trying to get their
frustrated bitterness out of their system, as Robert
Powell seems to have deserted us.

RS's picture

The thing is, Lewis Hamilton is a lying, arrogant prick.

His race is irrelevant. He's a horrible person - reflected in how few fans he has.

K's picture

Hello everyone, I'm Spanish myself and wouldn't like to be compared in any way to these "mosquito brains" as we call them in Spain. They are not representative in any way of ALL Spaniards. They can't even spell the word familly properly, if you look at the picture they worte it "familly". I agree these people should be told to go and do the dickheads somewhere where they can't be seen.

gnuneo's picture

hey, leave him alone! OK, so not one of his best efforts, but a damned sight more amusing than most of the critiques of him have been.

i'd like to see you racists try to come up with an amusing article once a week - actually scrub that, i can already imagine what kind of low-brow grunting unfunniness would result.

paul h's picture

thay need to grow up the spanish , i am lewis bro in law and hes has a good family

Lawrence2's picture

I look at that photo and wonder what the surrounding members of the crowd thought of these comedy geniuses.

Is this kind of behaviour such the cultural norm in Spain that most crowd members were nonchalant to it? Were they complicit by remaining in close proximity and not stopping these 'japesters', their inaction being just as much a part of the problem.Or were they ignoring them the whole time in silent disapproval and focusing on the race and not giving them the attention they deserved. Which side of the moral mark were they? Did someone nearby in fact voice their disapproval at some point and thus have a revelatory positive effect on them forcing them to see the error of their ways? Or after having words were they mocked or threatened in return? Alternatively did a group of people beat the seven shades out of the racists outside the stadium(I hope this option happened), and far enough away from the threat of arrest. I find it interesting because you can look at a photo in so many different ways and extract so many plausible different interpretations.

I'm inclined to think it might be a mixture of lots of things, but most people are scared to intervene these days. I don't know what I'd do until I was in it. Cop out I know. I don't think we as a nation can feel smug though because it wasn't that long ago we were guilty of monkey chants on the terraces. Incidently did anyone see these photos of the spanish olympic basketball team during the recent games:

http://www.odt.co.nz/files/story/2008/08/this_undated_photo_provided_by_...

Spankabuttux's picture

Both Louise and me (Swansealiker's everyman
monicker) posted last time and were deleted for
some weird reason. It'll probably happen now, too.
Some freak is/was in charge, hopefully this will
change in time.
My contribution, while it lasts, is:
Racism is rubbish, I reckon they should stop doing
it - let's all be mates.

terryuno's picture

If these people are as stupid as you say they are, why do you dedicate an entire column to them, giving them more publicity and actually raising their profile. This article probably says more about you than it does about them.

Lawrence2's picture

This columns' being censored big time. Hi mods!!

gnuneo's picture

i can't believe my post got censored! WTF?!?

Leslie Bona1's picture

What will you say about England, when English fooball fans are booing their players of colour. If you live in a glass house you should not throw stones.

Pekay's picture

Racism sucks, but the less exposure we give them the better . Instead we should focus on the positive elements of the event and leave the morons to self destruct.The Spanish, very much like the westernized people of India, are among the worst offenders, who unashamedly display their sense of inferiority simpl;y because the little extra pigment they have been endowed with simply won't go away, despite all the scrubbing with all the detergents available. The so called 'white man" still refer to non-whites as various shades of black ( olive for the spanish, i suppose ), much to their chagrin!! The indians at the time of apartheid were so happy to eat the crumbs of the white man's table so long as the white man would give the Indian the privilege of being the white man's coolie, and would designate the Indian as coloured and not black. The same with the Spanish and generally with all the racists in the world. As the article accurately points out, racists are generally ugly specimens of homo sapiens, desperately unable to love themselves because of their own perceived inferiority.

Spankabuttux's picture

Leslie bona, are you serious? Every country has
racist nobends, England included; we are talking
about a specific event, which should embarass any
civilised country. It's not belittling Spaniards, it's
belittling racists.

KimMelanson1990's picture

"...isn't racist, because the Spanish are not a race..."

That's all right. They just hate the English - even if the English aren't a race, duh.

The again, perhaps they are mocking the (white) English by wearing black faces and thus emulating being black, ha ha?

After all, its widely known (at least to the Spanish - or to some Spanish) that the English are stupid..... so how would they know they are being mocked anyway?

But its also incorrect to say that "...it's hard to think of any racists who aren't pathetic physical and mental specimens..." unless the English also fit into that category..... which they usually do quite easily.

So, who is the real idiot, then, Richard Herring? Some English hombre who looks "like a right prick now"? Anyway, waht has any of this got to do with God or the Spanish?

Those people in the crowd in Spain hadn't been racists at all - they were just admiring Hamilton's performances on the track.

And what about the Herring "family" (herrings in')? You should dress up (in tomato sauce) as a poor satire of yourself, wearing a T-shirt saying "I am (fishy) mee"..... LOL

Richard Herring1's picture

But they're not mocking Hamilton for being English they are doing it because he is black. And yes of course the English racists are just as bad - and I don't know if you've seen photos of them but they are, in my experience, fat bald and oleaginous.
As to not mentioning it for fear of promoting racism? If you read that article and think - hmmmm think racism is for me, then you're beyond help anyway. It's extremely important to stand up to these people and show how pathetic they are to prevent them ever getting any kind of power. It's not a coincidence that fascist regimes deal so badly with satire. Humour and common sense can deflate these fools in a second. The opening bit about all Spanish people being racist is (of course) a joke, which I even qualify in the article. And just in case anyone didn't get it, as there seems to have been an unusual influx of the intellectually challenged gravitating to this article - the last paragraph is a joke as well. In fact Lewis Hamilton's dad is bald, so that's another thing the Spanish protestors got wrong.

jon's picture

You lot need to take your heads out of your anus. I thought it was the funniest thing i have seen in a long time, superb - genius.

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