Ask Marina
Telling tales out of school...
- Posted by Marina Pepper
- 16 February 2007
A plea from Notting Hill plus the demands of kinky youth
Dear Marina
I've been accused of something one may or may not have got up to at Eton but I'm blowed if I’m going to engage in a debate on the rights and wrongs of nipping off for a quick toke on a schoolmate's ganja!
If I got an eighth of the coverage for my obvious green credentials I wouldn’t be feeling so blue. I’m convinced a Liberal gal like you – and one with a past - understands one’s predicament. How can one shut up those Fleet Street chavs and get them to concentrate on important issues like law and order?
DC, Notting Hill
It makes for a mind blowing departure from tradition, but have you considered coming clean?
It’s a cracking idea. The hacks would be killing each other for your personal views on, say, the economic impact of white collar drug use in The City, the need for a Royal Commission on drugs, rehabilitation investment, alcohol abuse - a greater threat, prison overcrowding and class inequality in the criminal justice system.
If you want to take it higher, deal them a Proustian puff piece on the damaging effects of drug-use on memory and how confused the narrative strands of “before” and “after” can appear.
March to it boy. There’s no time like the present.
Dear Marina,
I'm a 50-year-old and I've recently started dating a girl half my age. The other night, whilst in the throes of passion, she suggestively whispered in my ear that we should spice things up by experimenting with kinky games. The thing is, this isn't something that I've engaged in before and don't really know what she is expecting – I'm afraid to ask her because I don't want her to think that I'm unschooled in the art of bedroom mischief. I'm planning to get a whip and some rubber gloves. What else can you suggest?
Philosophiser, Cambridge
Are you serious? Whips and rubber gloves sound so Oxford.
Ask the young lady (over dinner) what she means by kinky.
Always best to know in advance if there’s an outside chance you could end up trussed in the wardrobe dressed as Batman.
You never know, she might settle for a go on top.
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