Secret diary of a businessperson who is also female

Naked nudity.

The New Statesman's Businessperson Who Is Also Female asks why some women happily prance around naked in the office gym changing room only to then cover up in the presence of men in the boardroom.

Topicality Watch! By coincidence my esteemed peer Board Babe has recently written about a very similar subject over at the Telegraph.

As a woman who is also a businessperson, I have recently spent time in the gym. Maybe it's something to do with the Olympics?!? (Topical). I went to the gym recently, and couldn't help but notice that there were a lot of women in the women's changing room. Women who looked different from each other. Women putting their socks on, women opening and closing lockers. Some of these women had literally no clothes on them at all.

All this got me thinking. Why is it, that in the changing room, women will happily wear no clothes - confident as wood nymphs frolicking in an autumn glade - yet in the boardroom will often "cover themselves" through wearing several layers of clothing (this point is metaphorical)?

In a recent meeting, in which our company announced that half the staff were about to be made redundant, I noticed that many of the women were quiet, with defensive body language, eyes on the floor. I felt like we had returned to the 1950s, or migrated to Saudi Arabia, or been flung forward into some futuristic dystopia where women are quiet/clothed. Where was the "naked ambition" they had shown after real tennis? Surely they could have pulled their socks up (metaphorically), rolled up their sleeves (metaphorically), and come up with some ideas to pull this company up by its boot straps? Why are women so rubbish apart from me?

My advice to women? Be better.


Dita Von Teese is almost naked in this picture. Photograph: Getty Images

Businessperson Who Is Also Female is a woman. She is currently enjoying Board Babe, a Telegraph blog by a female who is also a businessperson. Great minds..!!

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Commons Confidential: Fearing the Wigan warrior

An electoral clash, select committee elections as speed dating, and Ed Miliband’s political convalescence.

Members of Labour’s disconsolate majority, sitting in tight knots in the tearoom as the MP with the best maths skills calculates who will survive and who will die, based on the latest bad poll, observe that Jeremy Corbyn has never been so loyal to the party leadership. The past 13 months, one told me, have been the Islington rebel’s longest spell without voting against Labour. The MP was contradicted by a colleague who argued that, in voting against Trident renewal, Corbyn had defied party policy. There is Labour chatter that an early general election would be a mercy killing if it put the party out of its misery and removed Corbyn next year. In 2020, it is judged, defeat will be inevitable.

The next London mayoral contest is scheduled for the same date as a 2020 election: 7 May. Sadiq Khan’s people whisper that when they mentioned the clash to ministers, they were assured it won’t happen. They are uncertain whether this indicates that the mayoral contest will be moved, or that there will be an early general election. Intriguing.

An unguarded retort from the peer Jim O’Neill seems to confirm that a dispute over the so-called Northern Powerhouse triggered his walkout from the Treasury last month. O’Neill, a fanboy of George Osborne and a former Goldman Sachs chief economist, gave no reason when he quit Theresa May’s government and resigned the Tory whip in the Lords. He joined the dots publicly when the Resolution Foundation’s director, Torsten Bell, queried the northern project. “Are you related to the PM?” shot back the Mancunian O’Neill. It’s the way he tells ’em.

Talk has quietened in Westminster Labour ranks of a formal challenge to Corbyn since this year’s attempt backfired, but the Tories fear Lisa Nandy, should the leader fall under a solar-powered ecotruck selling recycled organic knitwear.

The Wigan warrior is enjoying favourable reviews for her forensic examination of the troubled inquiry into historic child sex abuse. After Nandy put May on the spot, the Tory three-piece suit Alec Shelbrooke was overheard muttering: “I hope she never runs for leader.” Anna Soubry and Nicky Morgan, the Thelma and Louise of Tory opposition to Mayhem, were observed nodding in agreement.

Select committee elections are like speed dating. “Who are you?” inquired Labour’s Kevan Jones (Granite Central)of a stranger seeking his vote. She explained that she was Victoria Borwick, the Tory MP for Kensington, but that didn’t help. “This is the first time you’ve spoken to me,” Jones continued, “so the answer’s no.” The aloof Borwick lost, by the way.

Ed Miliband is joining Labour’s relaunched Tribune Group of MPs to continue his political convalescence. Next stop: the shadow cabinet?

Kevin Maguire is Associate Editor (Politics) on the Daily Mirror and author of our Commons Confidential column on the high politics and low life in Westminster. An award-winning journalist, he is in frequent demand on television and radio and co-authored a book on great parliamentary scandals. He was formerly Chief Reporter on the Guardian and Labour Correspondent on the Daily Telegraph.

This article first appeared in the 27 October 2016 issue of the New Statesman, American Rage