I'm a mole, innit.
“How often have most of us driven over a motorway bridge?”
More Muslim women have been called “letter box” in the wake of his column.
“Oh sorry, I just shagged your wife, didn’t realise, ooh!”
A social phenomenon sweeping Britain.
But he’s definitely not starting a culture war.
“They used to call it England.”
The ongoing heatwave has apparently led to a £31bn boost to the UK economy.
With friends like these…
“All the arrivals were Muslims.”