New Times,
New Thinking.

9 May 2015

Good news for Scottish Labour! JK Rowling invites Jim Murphy to be in Gryffindor

"Unbelievable guts".

By Media Mole

As Britain’s cruel giant electoral sorting hat has lumped the country firmly in Slytherin, there is a shred of hope for Scottish Labour.

JK Rowling has invited its leader, Jim Murphy, to join Gryffindor!

Murphy lost his seat last night to the SNP, as did every single Scottish Labour MP but one. This mole wonders how the delights of the Gryffindor common room compare to those of East Renfrewshire.

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