After Harry weds Meghan, who is the most eligible prince of them all?

The blue-blooded bachelors of Europe.

NS

Sign Up

Get the New Statesman's Morning Call email.

Sorry, everyone who wanted to marry a British prince – US actress Meghan Markle has beat you to the last eligible one, at least until the 2030s. If you can’t wait that long, you’ll have to go further afield and bag yourself a European prince. Hey, at least you might be able to retain your EU citizenship!

Some European monarchies can immediately be ruled out by those who aren’t willing to wait: Monaco, Norway, the Netherlands and Sweden currently have no princes of marriageable age who aren’t already married. So what are your remaining options if looking to wed a more or less bonafide prince in the immediate future?

Prince Joseph Wenzel of Liechtenstein

Age: 22.

Position in line to the throne: Second (he’s also third in line to the Jacobite succession, if you fancy a bit of light civil war.)

Is he an actual prince? Yes, he’s the grandson of the Prince of Liechtenstein, and the son of the regent.

Does he have a palace? He’ll most likely inherit the family pad, Vaduz Castle, originally a 12th century fortress.

Does he have responsibilities? He doesn’t have a lot on right now, but he is probably going to be the reigning Prince of Liechtenstein one day.

Fun fact: He dreamed of being a football star as a child. Oh well, maybe something else will work out for him.

Eligible prince rating: 4/5.

Felipe de Marichalar y Borbón of Spain (pictured far right)

Age: 19.

Position in line to the throne: Fourth.

Is he an actual prince? No, but Spanish royal titles don’t work in quite the same way – as the king’s nephew he’s about as close as you can get, and people are supposed to call him “His Excellency”.

Does he have a palace? No.

Does he have responsibilities? Wikipedia alleges that he might in some way be sponsored by Dr Pepper, but the only source for this is an apparently non-existent book with the same ISBN as the first in the Animorphs series of young adult science fiction novels.

Fun fact: Despite his young age he is already notorious in the Spanish press for “antics” such as shooting himself in the foot, literally, and shouting racial slurs in the queue for a rollercoaster. Quite a catch!

Eligible prince rating: 1/5.

Prince Joachim of Belgium (pictured far right)

Age: 25.

Position in line to the throne: Ninth.

Is he an actual prince? Yes, he’s the nephew of Belgium’s King Philippe.

Does he have a palace? No.

Does he have responsibilities? No particularly royal ones as yet, though he’s an officer in the Belgian navy.

Fun fact: He’s descended from at least ten different European royal families, so at least you get a lot of royal “bang” for your marital “buck”.

Eligible prince rating: 3/5.

Prince Nikolai of Denmark (pictured centre)

Age: 18.

Position in line to the throne: Seventh.

Is he an actual prince? Yes, he’s the grandson of the Queen of Denmark.

Does he have a palace? Well, his dad’s royal residence is Schackenborg Castle – although it’s not officially owned by the family anymore, having been passed to a private foundation.

Does he have responsibilities? Apparently not – for the moment he’s been given the freedom to do whatever he wants to do. Which is apparently mainly listen to house music.

Fun fact: The first album he ever listened to was FutureSex/LoveSounds by Justin Timberlake, it says here.

Eligible prince rating: 3/5.

Prince Sébastien of Luxembourg

Age: 25.

Position in line to the throne: Sixth.

Is he an actual prince? Yes, he’s the son of the Grand Duke of Luxembourg, but he’s got older siblings with kids so don’t get your hopes up about a promotion.

Does he have a palace? Not as such, but he can probably give you a tour of his dad’s, the Grand Ducal Palace.

Does he have responsibilities? He’s an officer in the Luxembourg Army but turns up to various royal events, according to the website Royal Central.

Fun fact: Prince Sébastien shares a birthday with Little Jimmy Osmond and also there is not much information about him on the internet.

Eligible prince rating: 2/5.

The Pope

Age: 80.

Position in line to the throne: On it.

Is he an actual prince? Well, the Vatican is a monarchy, and he is the monarch, and his full title includes “Successor of the Prince of the Apostles”, so, if you squint? And Wikipedia confirms that he’s unmarried, ladies!

Does he have a palace? Unlike his predecessors, he turned down the option of living in the Apostolic Palace – but presumably he’s allowed to change his mind, because he’s the Pope.

Does he have responsibilities? He’s the Pope.

Fun fact: He loved to do the tango when he was young.

Eligible prince rating: 5/5.