Conservative canvasser fails to recognise Lynton Crosby

The favourite campaign story in Tory WhatsApp groups. 

 
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An amusing story from the campaign trail is circulating among Conservative WhatsApp groups. A young Tory activist was recently out door-knocking in the marginal seat of Kensington, where Felicity Buchan is hoping that the pro-Remain vote will be split between the Labour incumbent, Emma Dent Coad, and the former Conservative, now Liberal Democrat, Sam Gyimah. Kensington is one of the most unequal constituencies in the UK, with celebrities and a royal palace in some parts of the seat, and high levels of deprivation in others.

On the doorstep of one of Kensington’s grander houses, the 21-year-old activist introduced herself and, studying the VoteSource app on her phone, asked: “Are you Mr Crosby?”

“Yes,” came the reply.

“I’m canvassing on behalf of your Conservative candidate, Felicity Buchan. Can I ask which way you are voting on 12 December?” 

“l’m Lynton Crosby.”

“Yes ... we’ve covered that,” the activist ploughed on. “So how would you rank the parties on a scale of 0 to 10, where 0 is no chance you would vote for them, and 10 is you definitely would? How about the Conservative Party?"

“I’m Lynton Crosby. So I am a 10 for the Conservatives.”

“I see ... thank you,” replied the slightly bemused canvasser. “Can we contact you via email or mobile?”

“That won’t be necessary,” replied the man who ran the Conservative election campaign in 2015 and 2017, and whom the Prime Minister famously has on speed dial. “Good luck!”

Ailbhe Rea is political correspondent at the New Statesman