Tuesday, and the Irish (the Republic of Irish) announced Sonja Hyland as the new Ambassador to Great Britain. Were you to examine the response of the Britishers – or perhaps that should be United Kingdomish – you might reasonably have concluded that the good people of Eire had appointed Hyland as the new Ambassador to Mordor, or Democratic Kampuchea.
Great Britain is the incorrect designation for the entire country formally known as the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, you see. And this announcement was therefore an act of sinister irredentism – a way to rhetorically lay claim to the six counties north of the Northern Irish Border (not to be known as “The North”, not even colloquially, or indeed, “The North of Ireland”). Deep state plot, perhaps? A slow, creeping nationalist land grab from the Irish civil service? Why else erase Northern Ireland from the title?
“Off the charts pettiness” one commentator remarked of Ireland’s diplomatic efforts. “A beautiful country, full of wonderful people, governed by disrespectful land grabbing c*nts,” wrote another. It was somewhat less polite than Steven who says he is “getting mildly fed up of Ireland”; while Colin was minded to condemn the “really embarrassing puerile stuff from an Irish Government representative”.
Not to deny anyone their right to semantic tantrum, but long-term observers of Ireland’s diplomatic corps will know that Ambassador to Great Britain is a traditional – but not necessarily formal – designation for the role. It would be strange for many reasons to conduct the cross border communication between the northern and southern parts of the island of Ireland (do NOT say The South or, ever, Southern Ireland) via an embassy in SW1. And, for the sake of consistency the extremely, rightly, and gravely offended ought to turn their attention to the former Tánaiste (Tawn-ish-ta, or deputy head of the Free State) in 2022 – he was excited to speak of Ireland’s “diplomatic network in Great Britain”. Off the charts pettiness!
What happened to These Sensitive Isles? Whenever the Anglo-Irish-Celto-British-Whatever relationship is invoked, a squabble emerges. Brexit: Theresa May was cautious to refer to “Northern Ireland and Ireland,” as though Northern Ireland was not in Ireland, while Boris Johnson was more of a “Republic of Ireland” guy. Both approaches offend – the country is called Ireland, say the Irish who live in the Republic part of the island of Ireland, which seems to suggest “Northern Ireland” is not as legitimate a part of said “Ireland” because that only exists south of the latitude 54.59° N and longitude of 5.93°. Keep up.
But the problem is written into the politics. What else to do when naming the Irish Ambassador? Ulster Unionists might want to pretend that Northern Ireland’s constitutional existence as a statelet is an entirely normal arrangement. But of course it is not, and the constructive ambiguity of Northern Ireland’s political status is bound to find expression in the rhetoric too. As for Ireland vs Republic there of vs North vs The South… Well? Historical sensitivities make people sensitive.
The result is offence taken on offence taken on offence – in a manner that must look like swivel-eyed lunacy to anyone not resident to the British Irish Archipelago (doesn’t quite roll off the tongue like British Isles, does it?). Consider the Greeks and Macedonia, all of which of course makes no sense to anyone who is neither Greek nor Macedonian – sorry, North Macedonian, I think? What I do know is that the Prespa Agreement of June 2018 made explicit that North Macedonia wasn’t Hellenic Macedonia but the Slavic Macedonian language could be called such.
During his first visit to Northern Ireland on Thursday, Burnham said a border poll was “off the table”. This was in breach of the Belfast/Good Friday Agreement said the Irish. Northern Ireland Secretary Sir Chris Bryant intervened to clarify that Burnham was not making a “general statement about the whole future of the Good Friday Agreement” but that a border poll was just not literally on the table today. Squabble: emerged.
To keep the rhetorical peace, the Prime Minister (British Taoiseach) ought to have said “discussion of a border poll is off the table from now until 1159 GMT+ in full accordance with the GFA (1998) which advises that ‘if at any time it appears likely to him that a majority of those voting would express a wish that Northern Ireland should cease to be part of the United Kingdom and form part of a united Ireland’ then he should hold a border poll”. And then what? All of that, just to sound like Keir Starmer?
[Further reading: What is a right-wing restaurant?]
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Subscribe here to commentAs a long standing member of the Luton Irish I always use the term ‘the six counties’. It is a good way of eliciting a question and then I can go on to explain that Ulster has nine counties and three of them remain in Ireland.
Fantastic, enjoyed the Luton Irish thing, is that a sort of Kaliningrad. We will send you as an ambassador to Cyprus, or maybe even the USA – playing silly games with names seems popular currently, lake America! I think as Scots Irish, surname tells it all, I’m keen to talk to the Adams family about a possible name change. Derry or Londonderry anybody?
I couldn’t possibly comment but I am also a devout Celtic fan. Jock Stein was the greatest ever Scotsman and a great socialist. He knew that a divided working class was no good just like a divided football team. He looked like my dad. Names are nothing compared to deeds.