Media 16 May 2019 Cringe UK: Watch the moment a Change UK MP tells her audience to “look at your hands” “That’s it, it’s there, that’s the answer to this – it’s in your hands.” LBC screengrab Heavy-handed. Sign UpGet the New Statesman's Morning Call email. Sign-up There’s another party running in the European elections at the last minute, and its name is Cringe UK. Vote for it if you want muscle-clenching rhetoric and wince-inducing messaging. Because that’s the kind of politics Labour-turned-Change UK MP Joan Ryan delivered at a rally today. “Can you just look at your hands, please?” she asked, holding hers out above the lectern, like Oliver Twist at a primary school mock election. “That’s it, it’s there. That’s the answer to this. It’s in your hands.” She then released her hands from their book-like display with a flourish. Watch it here, if you can see through your own hands, which presumably have gravitated over your face in horror: Change UK's Joan Ryan: “Can you just look at your hands please?” ** everyone holds out their hands in front them ** “That’s it, it’s there, that's the answer to this. It's in your hands.” pic.twitter.com/3SvfTIsy4D — LBC (@LBC) May 16, 2019 A positive and uplifting moment in British politics, if you read some of the best Twitter jokes: 'He's got the whoooole world/ in His hands/ He's got the whole wide world/ in His hands/ He's got the whooole world/ in His hands/ He's got the whole world in His hands' - Joan Ryan to the People's Vote rally she confused with an assembly of primary-age school children https://t.co/OlztkV6Nrh — LEILA SACKUR (@lei_sack) May 16, 2019 Why is this Joan Ryan after delivering the killer line pic.twitter.com/sdZI2g4Bhs — Frankie Leach (@francesleach_) May 16, 2019 since when is joan ryan every secondary school guidance counsellor ever https://t.co/UllopoAvwH — Peter “Could be Dangerous” Banks (@PeterBanksLD) May 16, 2019 FDR: "The only thing to fear is fear itself." JFK: "Ask not what your country can do for you but what you can do for your country." Blair: "A New Dawn has broken, has it not?" Joan Ryan: "Can you just look at your hands please?" https://t.co/Q1i4ZgX08M — Will Barber - Taylor (@Blackadder345) May 16, 2019 Men Without Hats: We can dance, we can dance... Joan Ryan: ...everybody look at your hands — Tom Powdrill (@TomPowdrill) May 16, 2019 Joan Ryan confirmed for next Asda Shrewsbury People Manager https://t.co/rS0AiKHiow — Meredith (@Sam_M_Meredith) May 16, 2019 Is Joan Ryan campaigning for Head Girl at Enfield High school? https://t.co/xc1hq0eeCM — Big Paddy Kane (@_paddington_) May 16, 2019 Change UK MP Joan Ryan: “Can everyone look at their hands please?” ****cue everyone holds out their hands in front them**** ***Joan Ryan grabs wrists and manipulates them to strike their faces*** “Stop hitting yourself”. — Tom Neenan (@TNeenan) May 16, 2019 I’m Joan Ryan and you’ve been The Best pic.twitter.com/RvZtD8nLDK — Paul (@greasydunlop) May 16, 2019 The best part of this speech is that she tells the audience: “You’re really good, you’re doing that ever so well, that’s the best I’ve seen it done – brilliant!” So she’s done it before. And with that, your mole will leave you with the Safety Dance: › Sian Berry: Why the Green Party is backing a European minimum income directive I'm a mole, innit. Subscribe For more great writing from our award-winning journalists subscribe for just £1 per month!