Good news from the Daily Mail! 48 per cent of the country now in the “elite”

A triumph of social mobility.

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It looked like times were tough for the British public. After years of austerity, the rich getting richer, the privately educated 7 per cent taking up top jobs, and no end in sight to our economic woes with Brexit on the way, the plight of the majority was only set to get worse.

But the Daily Mail has stemmed this pessimism with its belter of a scoop today: nearly half of Britain is now in the “elite”.

The paper has splashed on a wonderful good news story about the triumph of social mobility that somehow the rest of the press has missed.

Here’s its frontpage today:

Your mole is delighted. It turns out there’s not some tiny cabal of well-connected, property-guzzling, cash-hoarding people running the country and ruining it for the rest of us, after all. There is no wealthy minority. Apparently the 48 per cent of the electorate who voted Remain now count as the “elite”. Champagne all round! 

I'm a mole, innit.