Order what the hell you want, relish your own company, and enjoy a dessert with just the one spoon.
CBD oil, a non-psychoactive cannabis extract, has been described as “the new avocado toast… much bigger than kale, much bigger than quinoa, and much more fundamental”.
Hit hard by nouvelle cuisine and the financial crash, seasonal trade here isn’t what it once was.
A Tesco spokesman tells me the company hasn’t sold them for “many, many years”.
As a serial murderer of house plants I’m relieved to find that, in theory at least, “starters are actually really hard to kill”.
When I was at university I cooked pasta in a kettle. Today’s students share their carrot and coconut porridge and home-made bread on Instagram.
Medieval banquets, Whitstable oysters and Jimi Hendrix.
The Victorian “Queen of Ices” has a good claim to have invented the cornet.
Things have moved on: quinoa and protein shakes have taken the place of pies and puddings.
The more adventurous among our French friends are plucking up the courage to give the second-worst cuisine in Europe a try.
Theirs will be the first royal nuptials since Queen Victoria’s not to be marked with a marzipan-covered doorstop of dried fruit.