Nicholas Lezard is a literary critic for the Guardian and also writes for the Independent. He writes the Down and Out in London column for the New Statesman.
The Girl has outmanoeuvred me yet again, but then again I told my children that my main job as a father was to make sure that they turned out smarter than me.
How to stop young people smoking – put a bloody great curtain in front of the fags!
One imagines that the abilities of 47,000-plus employees sitting around on beanbags and drinking really good coffee could have been put to better use.
Thoughts on the Bachelor Condition: #2 in an occasional series. (Or number 300-odd, if we assume this whole column is an ongoing meditation.)
“I hate it,” I said. “I hate it more than I can say.”
Down and out.
What shall I do with the money? At the moment, I am typing this on a laptop that is perched on a chair by the side of my bed.
The idea of my child getting behind the wheel of several tonnes of rusting Mercedes is one that I cannot begin to grasp, like trying to imagine what is beyond the universe.
Even thinking about a backscratcher makes the back cry out for one.
My only consolation, as I now wonder what on earth I am going to put my Marmite on besides my finger, is that Mousie will have burst like a balloon with the amount he has eaten.
The Zombie PM
The doomed premiership of Theresa May