Jamie's Dream School

Who's ruder - dropout kids or David Starkey?

The first part of Jamie's Dream School (Wednesdays, 9pm), in which various talented notables attempt to inspire a bunch of secondary-school dropouts, was disappointing from my point of view. Thanks to Channel 4's copious advance publicity, I was so looking forward to seeing Alastair Campbell (Mr Politics) and Cherie Blair (Ms Human Rights - and do stop sniggering at the back) get hit by the 21st-century equivalent of an ink bomb. Alas, I'll have to wait another week for that great treat.

In part one, the 20 students, none of whom had left school with the minimum five GCSEs, were taught only by a first tranche: Simon Callow (drama), Robert Winston (science), Rolf "Can-You-Tell-What-It-Is-Yet?" Harris (art), Ellen MacArthur (sailing) and David Starkey (history and a light smattering of rudeness). Well, I say "taught". That's an exaggeration. There was very little learning going on. Mostly what we saw was shouting, disrespect (ironic, given how obsessed with "respect" these teenagers are), boredom and a pathetic kind of chippiness that drove me, for one, nuts. Oh, yes - and puking. This lot are so feeble that the sight of a pig's intestines - urgh, that's disgusting, innit, Mr Winston! - has them rushing outside to hurl up their guts.

Why, I wonder, did they agree to take part, given how completely uninterested they are in anything other than texting, smoking and lip? They are all over 16, after all; this is voluntary. You will say that they fancied being on the telly, and you are probably right. But how much more interesting this series would have been had Jamie recruited to his "dream school" students who had failed, but who also genuinely wanted to rewrite their futures.

I doubt this is his fault, though. The people at Channel 4 are more interested in drama than in enabling young brains to fire. We know this not only by the students they have enrolled, but also because, so far, no one has even suggested doing the one thing that would immediately fix the discipline problem. Why has the class not been divided into two groups - one of boys, the other of girls? I remember enough about my own co-educational, and at times very rowdy school to identify in these girls a desire to learn wrestling hard with the fear of looking uncool in front of the boys - and vice versa.

Oh, well. The humiliation of the staff is entertaining. As Jamie put it: "We [the talented celebs] are used to people being interested in us . . . but they [the students] don't give a shit." On Question Time, David Starkey rises like a cobra in a basket to the occasion. But in Jamie's Dream School, he sweated a lot and finished his first lesson - about Anglo-Saxon jewellery, which Starkey thought very Beyoncé and the kids thought very boring - looking surprisingly chastened, even a little sad. "Attention deficit disorder is . . . a description of a whole generation," he said, having noted the class's inability to concentrate. "And that makes them . . . fodder. And the tragedy is, they're destroying themselves." Rolf Harris and Simon Callow looked like they might cry, although Callow is his own worst enemy. The man is an actor, for God's sake. Why does he not modify his ridiculous popinjay voice a little?

There is an interesting tension, too, in that while the school's head teacher, John d'Abbro, is painfully PC, Jamie is clearly a traditionalist at heart - for all that he left school with only two GCSEs. As part one ended, the pair were at battle over Starkey, who had called a boy "fat" (the comment was unkind and injudicious but it was not, I'm afraid, inaccurate).

D'Abbro is upset about this, and thinks it a sacking offence, which is somewhat bewildering given that Starkey needs this gig like he needs a hole in the head. But Jamie, impressed both with Starkey's brain and with his background (his mother was a cleaner) is keen to keep him. Jamie, inevitably, will win this battle, assuming Starkey can be bothered to continue instructing the class in the ways of Henry VIII's codpiece. For all his faults, Oliver knows instinctively that it is patronising to mollycoddle the deprived and disenfranchised - and that those on the receiving end of such treatment always recognise it for exactly what it is.

16 comments

IanMcM's picture

I wonder what sort of adults these kids will turn into? There is some hope for some of them but others do not realise that this is their 2nd. chance.

John J's picture

"But how much more interesting this series would have been had Jamie recruited to his "dream school" students who had failed, but who also genuinely wanted to rewrite their futures."

I'm surprised to see this statement in the leftist New Statesman. Surely if kids don't succeed it's the teachers fault, society's fault, the govt's fault - everyone other than the kids who don't want to learn?

Lisa J. Ellwood's picture

If you watch the full clip minus the unfortunate slip of the tongue by Starkey on YouTube - you will see that gave quite a good history lesson to the students getting them to understand how their modern-day language, posturing et all had roots in the past. He was able to engage them with rap music - shrewd move on his part and it worked. Channel 4 is clearly editing for the sake of entertainment. However, it is worth noting that the lippy, larking-about few for each teacher were always the same students - with Connor leading the pack and dominating at every opportunity.. Sad thing is they do have potential and just don't care. They have to put the hard work in and If nothing else, Starkey and Alvin Hall proved that you can come from a dirt-poor background and be successful I found them both very inspiring.

Daniele1's picture

This program was bound to fail as it started from the false premise that those kids failed at school because they were "bored" and needed to be "inspired" by interesting people to find the courage to get their brain to work.
I find the concept of the program a complete insult to teachers no matter what Jamie says.
The idea was that these "celebrities" surely would be able to do what dozens of professionals had failed to do in 10 years in just a few contact hours and thus restore faith in the those young geniuses.
How naive and stupid!
The failure of the British education system is entirely due the fact that teachers are prevented from imposing discipline .After having removed all manner of sanctions in schools , society is then putting all the blame on those very teachers when their lack of authority results in mayhem in schools and an absurd number of kids failing to reach basic levels at GCSE.
The stupid arrogance of these celebrities was breathtaking and I am glad they had a glimpse of what "real" teachers have to put up with day in, day out.

PaulWilks's picture

This can't be about education. Just because someone might be an expert in a particular field, doesn't mean they will be any good at actually teaching it.

Jen's picture

Is this the result of "Child centred education"? The students (some were adults with their own council flats living on benefits) were only interested in themselves, blaming everyone else for their educational failure, whilst playing to the camera for all they were worth.(Is "fat" Connor, the self appointed leader of the pack, hoping to get a tv gig out of this ?)
Good on the celebs, especially Starkey, but the students have to want to change.

Dan (Etular)'s picture

I find the above comments (and, to a somewhat lesser extent, the main article) absolutely horrendous, seeing as how this comes from a "Democratic Socialist"/Left-Wing newspaper.

Before I begin ranting, however, I must admit that I may be partially biased due to my own incredibly liberal views of Socialism itself. I'm no libertarian (far from, infact), but I also tend to be fairly supportive of high civil and political rights, whilst keeping the economy more-or-less equal (or, ofcourse, removing it. Why do we need such a capitalist construction anyway?).

Anywho, before I digress from the main topic, I felt the need to express how absolutely appalled I am at both the person that wrote the article and the majority of those that commented upon it, for the show (despite the fact that it picks scenes based on commercial value) has one thing right: "Those that do well get into the top groups, whereas those that don't are shoved in the bottom groups and forgotten about, innit?"

By claiming yourselves as "true socialists", yet denying these kids both the right to a good education (I scoff at any claims of "They don't deserve it", due to the fact that this comes from the mouths of people who seek to abolish all forms of discrimination (of wealth, sex, race, sexuality etc.) from people who claim the -exact- same thing - "They don't deserve rights because they don't deserve it") and the freedom of expression they deserve (by limiting the children with discipline, whether you like it or not, you are impeaching on their civil rights and/or ability to express themselves - they need to learn in a way that benefits them. Surely, we all know what an iron-fisted tyrannical hierarchy of the "important" at the top and "lesser" people at the bottom will bring?).

What do I propose? Simple. A more casual, friendly environment that is more down-to-earth. The one main problem facing our education system today is not too little discipline - rather, it is the teaching methods that people follow. All that, in my eyes, can be learned from "good ol'" cane-thwacking is resentment for the "supervisor" (and, ofcourse, being oppressed/coerced into conforming - and we all know (some of us even preaching) how oppression is never the answer).

I, personally, know that, for most children, the issue is either the strictness of the teaching method or the "holier-than-thou" attitude of most teachers. We are entering a new generation of children, each more liberal-minded and outspoken than the last (except with a few simple-minded bigots, ofcourse, but they are increasingly rare). Therefore, if these people are "spoke down upon", they will act in rebellion by simply refusing to co-operate. Not out of a desire to not learn, rather, out of a desire to speak one's mind and get it heard. They desire, as do I, a setting in which teachers speak to students as equals - perhaps even acting/dressing/speaking in ways in which they can relate (another thing the new generation seems to lack is attention-spans, hence, this is one solution). To let them speak their piece if need be, but make it somewhat work-related. If people aren't doing work, ask them why. "It's boring" - then challenge them to make it more interesting, and follow through! Gather ideas, and actually work with the children!

So often, as socialists, we talk about removing the class barriers - why, then, do we seek to add an age-barrier or hierarchy similar to that found in capitalism in our schools when there should be the same extent of equality?

Marcia Shelton's picture

If this programme doesn't increase respect for secondary teachers nothing will. I am now retired, but during my teaching career was increasingly saddened by the growing unwillingness of the national and local authorities to discipline pupils who misbehaved. Decent kids who were willing to learn were constanly being marginalised by the hooligans, who got all the attention and too great a share of the scarce resources. Now we see the result, as we slip ever further down the international league table of educational attainmemt.

oneoflokis's picture

I wish I'd watched this whole series now! Seen from the perspective of the current A C Grayling New College of the Humanities scandal (people have made comparisons already) I can see the differences: I've always thought that Jamie Oliver has his heart in the right place, far more than snooty people like Dawkins and Grayling (hey, I wonder what those rough kids would make of their elitist rants and secular Bibles? I'd like to set council estate kids on the pair of them! Precisely because I am not a Christian!)

The difference between the Dream School and NCH is that Dream School, far from costing £18,000 a year, made some kind of attempt to do something for the economically disadvantaged. For that it has to be given props. Like I said, I'd really like to see Dawkins take the same kind of crap Starkey did; explain his ideas to rough/"clueless" kids; tell why he thinks religion is bunk to a class with at least 3 or 4 Muslims and religious black Christian kids. Yeah: they'd need a good metal detector: but I think

oneoflokis's picture

..Dawkins would come out of it a wiser, less smug fellow! Let the kids at him, that's it! I'd also like the kids to be read sections of the Bible and Grayling's secular Good Book side by side, pick them apart and say which they think is the best! (And if we've got time left over we can do a few Norse sagas and eddas!)

Jen: there's an old joke: "How many psychotherapists does it take to change a lightbulb?" "First the lightbulb has to WANT to change." (!) I think that's in the realm of what you mean! I agree kids need to WANT to learn: which should be inculcated by parents - OR opinion-formers like kids' TV presenters perhaps? Stead of all that pop music earwash. They should learn to ask/whine "But why do we have to learn this/why's it important" ONCE - not ten million times (from personal experience!)

But as to the "adults" given places - do you mean 18-yr-old school-leavers? In Germany secondary education does not end till age 19 - this happens in practice in this country too: retaking exams etc.

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