Morning Call: pick of the papers

The ten must-read comment pieces from this morning's papers.

1. In Egypt, we thought democracy was enough. It was not (Guardian)

Mohamed Morsi broke his promises to the Egyptian people, writes Ahdaf Soueif. He must go, and the revolution must continue.

2. British left is turning against Europe (Financial Times)

Labour is watching the social market become less social and more of a market, writes Janan Ganesh.

3. Labour's spending worked. Why don't they defend it? (Guardian)

Blair and Brown improved schools and hospitals and cut poverty – but never embedded this agenda in the national psyche, writes Polly Toynbee. 

4. Does Len McCluskey or Ed Miliband run Labour? (Times)

The Labour leader cannot let a trade union boss dictate who his MPs are, says Rachel Sylvester. He must show he’s in charge.

5. Mark Carney is hailed as a saviour – but what do we really know about him? (Guardian)

The new Bank of England governor's CV contains details that should give one pause – such as that decade spent in the Goldman Sachs shark pool, says Aditya Chakrabortty.

6. The Tories must beware these feelings of irrational exuberance (Daily Telegraph)

The polls are going the party’s way, but the odds remain stacked against a win in 2015, writes Benedict Brogan.

7. Will Ed win this EU battle, but lose the war? (Independent)

Without Labour or Lib Dem participation, the vote on a referendum this Friday will be a farce - but , eventually, Miliband must decide one way or the other, writes John Rentoul.

The most vociferous critics expected far more than a mere mortal could deliver, writes Gideon Rachman.

9. For-profit state schools should not be ruled out (Independent)

The focus must be on the quality of the service, not the mechanism by which it is provided, says an Independent editorial. 

10. Keep the rot from the system – give MPs a rise (Daily Telegraph)

Politicians should take a back seat on the issue of their pay, and leave it to Ipsa to decide, says Jack Straw.

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An alternative Trainspotting script for John Humphrys’ Radio 4 “Choose Life” tribute

Born chippy.

Your mole often has Radio 4’s Today programme babbling away comfortingly in the background while emerging blinking from the burrow. So imagine its horror this morning, when the BBC decided to sully this listening experience with John Humphrys doing the “Choose Life” monologue from Trainspotting.

“I chose not to choose life: I chose something else. And the reasons? There are no reasons. Who needs reasons when you’ve got Radio 4?” he concluded, as a nation cringed.

Introduced as someone who has “taken issue with modernity”, Humphrys launched into the film character Renton’s iconic rant against the banality of modern life.

But Humphrys’ role as in-studio curmudgeon is neither endearing nor amusing to this mole. Often tasked with stories about modern technology and digital culture by supposedly mischievous editors, Humphrys sounds increasingly cranky and ill-informed. It doesn’t exactly make for enlightening interviews. So your mole has tampered with the script. Here’s what he should have said:

“Choose life. Choose a job and then never retire, ever. Choose a career defined by growling and scoffing. Choose crashing the pips three mornings out of five. Choose a fucking long contract. Choose interrupting your co-hosts, politicians, religious leaders and children. Choose sitting across the desk from Justin Webb at 7.20 wondering what you’re doing with your life. Choose confusion about why Thought for the Day is still a thing. Choose hogging political interviews. Choose anxiety about whether Jim Naughtie’s departure means there’s dwindling demand for grouchy old men on flagship political radio shows. Choose a staunch commitment to misunderstanding stories about video games and emoji. Choose doing those stories anyway. Choose turning on the radio and wondering why the fuck you aren’t on on a Sunday morning as well. Choose sitting on that black leather chair hosting mind-numbing spirit-crushing game shows (Mastermind). Choose going over time at the end of it all, pishing your last few seconds on needlessly combative questions, nothing more than an obstacle to that day’s editors being credited. Choose your future. Choose life . . .”

I'm a mole, innit.