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This England

Set him free!

When a customer was spotted apparently stealing from his shop, Mark Ward apprehended the suspect, called the police and waited for help to arrive.

But after a two-hour wait in which he made a total of four 999 calls, he had no option but to bundle the man into his van and hand him over personally at the local police station.

During the increasingly desperate calls, Mr Ward was told that officers were too busy to respond and was furious to be advised at one stage: "You can let him go if you like."

Daily Mail (Ron Rubin)

Recycling paper towels

I've been splitting cotton wool balls for years and I've now become that ghastly Englishwoman who won't put the heating on. I wear more and more jerseys and sit at my desk in thick socks with a hot water bottle. And I'm extremely economical with kitchen paper. When I comb my boys' hair for nits, I use the same sheet of paper towel full of nits to wipe the table afterwards. I'm really trying to be careful. I get a perverse pleasure from not buying.

Daily Telegraph (Betty Logan)

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