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  1. Politics
18 May 2017

How would the Daily Mail report other policies through history if they were announced by Theresa May?

At last, someone is cracking down on Princes in the tower. 

By Media Mole

Something strange has happened. A disturbance in the force.

The Daily Mail . . .  likes someone?

We know, it’s eerie. 

This morning, the paper has responded to news that older people will be expected to pay more for their care – something it had previously attacked as a “death tax” – by rejoicing that: “EVERYONE can defer care bill – and keep £100k assets”. 

And when the Conservatives announced action on energy bills – previously decried by the paper as likely to “make the lights go out” – it was welcomed as a “crackdown on energy rip-offs”. As Ed Miliband’s former adviser tweeted:

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This got the Mole wondering. How would other policies through history have been reported by the Daily Mail had they been announced by Theresa May? Here are a few suggestions:

Logan’s Run

MAY’S BIG IDEA TO CUT CARE BILLS

The Black Death

MAY: I’LL MAKE IT EASIER TO GET ON THE PROPERTY LADDER

French Revolution

MAY’S CAKE FOR ALL

Soviet show trials

MAY SWEEPS AWAY EU-LOVING JUDGES

Mary I’s loss of Calais

FINALLY, WE’RE OUT OF EUROPE

 

The 1696 window tax

MAY: I’LL HELP FAMILIES SAVE ON SUNCREAM

The Puritan abolition of Christmas

MAY’S PRODUCTIVITY BOOST

MAY’S TURKEY REPRIEVE

MAY SAVES FAMILIES THOUSANDS ON NEEDLESS FOOT SPAS

Collective farming

MAY TO TACKLE OBESITY CRISIS

The cultural revolution

SPARROWS WERE OVER-RATED ANYWAY

King Herod’s slaughter of male babies

MAY EASES PRESSURE ON SCHOOL PLACES

MAY’S BOOST FOR GIRLS’ CHANCES IN STEM SUBJECTS

Death of the Princes in the Tower

MAY ENSURES STRONG, STABLE GOVERNMENT

Molotov-Ribbentrop pact

MAY’S NEW SPECIAL RELATIONSHIP

Opium Wars

AT LAST, A SENSIBLE CONVERSATION ON DRUGS

Roman withdrawal of legions in AD410

FINALLY, EUROPE IS OUT OF US

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Select and enter your email address Your weekly guide to the best writing on ideas, politics, books and culture every Saturday. The best way to sign up for The Saturday Read is via saturdayread.substack.com The New Statesman's quick and essential guide to the news and politics of the day. The best way to sign up for Morning Call is via morningcall.substack.com Our Thursday ideas newsletter, delving into philosophy, criticism, and intellectual history. The best way to sign up for The Salvo is via thesalvo.substack.com Stay up to date with NS events, subscription offers & updates. Weekly analysis of the shift to a new economy from the New Statesman's Spotlight on Policy team. The best way to sign up for The Green Transition is via spotlightonpolicy.substack.com
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  • Business / Corporate Services
  • Client / Customer Services
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  • Construction, Works, Engineering
  • Education, Curriculum and Teaching
  • Environment, Conservation and NRM
  • Facility / Grounds Management and Maintenance
  • Finance Management
  • Health - Medical and Nursing Management
  • HR, Training and Organisational Development
  • Information and Communications Technology
  • Information Services, Statistics, Records, Archives
  • Infrastructure Management - Transport, Utilities
  • Legal Officers and Practitioners
  • Librarians and Library Management
  • Management
  • Marketing
  • OH&S, Risk Management
  • Operations Management
  • Planning, Policy, Strategy
  • Printing, Design, Publishing, Web
  • Projects, Programs and Advisors
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  • Public Relations and Media
  • Purchasing and Procurement
  • Quality Management
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Visit our privacy Policy for more information about our services, how New Statesman Media Group may use, process and share your personal data, including information on your rights in respect of your personal data and how you can unsubscribe from future marketing communications.
THANK YOU