SMF wins at Christmas cards

"Retiring Rudolph"

The winner of this year's Christmas card competition (yes, there was a competition, didn't you know?) is the Social Market Foundation, whose card is a perfect parody of their own reports. Click for a bigger version:

The text on the back says:

The debacle surrounding the refranchising of Santa's West Coast Sleighline has thrown gift distribution policy into a snow flurry this Christmas.

Last month, Rudolph's operation of the line came to an abrupt end, as purple-nosed reindeer Prancer was unexpectedly awarded the contract. But, as Rudolph languished in unseasonably bad-tempered retirement, the Partnership of Lapland Elves and Baubles (P.L.E.B.s) uncovered significant technical flaws in the bidding process, based on risky stocking capacity projections.

In this year's Christmas commission, the SMF research fairies propose a radical overhaul of the tendering process to ensure that such problems don't snowball in future.

"This is virgin' on the ridiculous. Unless we sort this thing out, next year there'll be 12 drummers drumming before we get the gifts out."
- The Ombusnowman

Sponsor: Virgin Mary

Alex Hern is a technology reporter for the Guardian. He was formerly staff writer at the New Statesman. You should follow Alex on Twitter.

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What did Jeremy Corbyn really say about Bin Laden?

He's been critiqued for calling Bin Laden's death a "tragedy". But what did Jeremy Corbyn really say?

Jeremy Corbyn is under fire for describing Bin Laden’s death as a “tragedy” in the Sun, but what did the Labour leadership frontrunner really say?

In remarks made to Press TV, the state-backed Iranian broadcaster, the Islington North MP said:

“This was an assassination attempt, and is yet another tragedy, upon a tragedy, upon a tragedy. The World Trade Center was a tragedy, the attack on Afghanistan was a tragedy, the war in Iraq was a tragedy. Tens of thousands of people have died.”

He also added that it was his preference that Osama Bin Laden be put on trial, a view shared by, among other people, Barack Obama and Boris Johnson.

Although Andy Burnham, one of Corbyn’s rivals for the leadership, will later today claim that “there is everything to play for” in the contest, with “tens of thousands still to vote”, the row is unlikely to harm Corbyn’s chances of becoming Labour leader. 

Stephen Bush is editor of the Staggers, the New Statesman’s political blog.