Worm Perfect

<em>A French scientist reckons humans have only 28,000 genes, rather than 100,000. This puts them on

I'm a wonder, you're a worm,

I am off to Magdalen,

I'll be in my second term

While you're down there dagdalen.

You were born to feed the bird,

I was born to culture;

While I'm earning a decent third,

You'll be a garden multure.

Eton has its playing fields,

Monkseaton has its pasture:

I am what true breeding yields,

This year as with lasture.

Yes, I wriggle. Yes, I squirm.

But I was bred for ruling -

For I'm a nicer, pinker worm

And forked out for my schuling.

This article first appeared in the 05 June 2000 issue of the New Statesman, Driving back to happiness