1876's version of naughty pictures. Photo: Getty
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Yes, the government has the ability to restrict our ability to see porn online. But would it ever dare to?

The Tories want to restrict online porn to adults if they win the election. The age verification system needed is possible - but are we happy to let our credit card providers know what we're looking at online?

The Tory culture and media secretary, Sajid Javid, has announced that a Tory government would force age verification controls upon hardcore pornography sites. While complicated, this is not impossible. The policy debate about whether and how to control sexual information and pornography is broad and diverse. While this policy is nested in those larger debates, it is also at its core an extension of existing, relatively uncontroversial policies on preventing children from seeing pornography in the pre-online world.

British regulators have previously called for age verification controls for adult content. The Authority for Television On Demand (ATVOD) in 2013 sought to cut off payments to sites who did not implement age restrictions. A 2014 House of Commons Culture, Media and Sport Committee report on online safety cited age verification as a method to prevent children from seeing pornography.

Setting aside the question of whether it is appropriate for government to restrict certain content to children, is the announced Tory policy feasible? Yes, it is. The technology and the data exist to furnish the UK public with online credentials that could reliably assert age. The policy hinges on there being a business model to sustain age verification services, how privacy will be handled, and whether there is the political appetite to enforce it through blacklisting.

Adult content businesses will not implement their own age verification controls – they will rely on third parties to make age assertions about their users. Pornography consumers will therefore have to be enrolled in a service that allows them to login in a verified way to adult sites. There are two main ways this could happen:

  • A payment mechanism like a credit card can be used to assert that a person is over 18. As under 18s can get a credit card with an adult guarantor, the credit card companies would have to alter their operations somewhat for this to work. The benefit of this approach is that many adult sites accept credit card payments and so there is already a business and technical relationship in place to build upon.
  • An ‘identity provider’ could issue credentials that assert the age or an ‘over 18 claim’ to an adult site. Such companies already exist and are the basis of the Gov.UK Verify initiative which seeks to provide credentials for people to access government websites.

A key issue is that using a third party for online access means that someone is always looking over your shoulder. Since the content in this case is porn, people are going to be very sensitive about revealing their online habits and preferences. Many people will not like Visa or Mastercard and all of the intervening banks knowing which adult sites they visit, and those companies are not currently set up to hide or delete that information from their transactions. Identity providers can do this more readily, but there is a cost to creating privacy-preserving systems, to say nothing of the trust that people would have to place in companies that they are living up to their privacy promises.

Technically, it is certainly possible to build age verification systems that obfuscate the identity of the user from both the porn site and the identity provider. Again, this is an issue of business: who will pay for it, and is the model sustainable? The gambling sector has had age verification controls in place for years but not the ability to hide identity. It’s a complicated design, but possible. An alternative method would be for identity providers to scramble the user’s identity internally where it connects to the list of sites visited, and prevent the ID from being unscrambled except in the case of a court order. This would require a good deal of policy development with ATVOD. In any model, though, payments further complicate the issue as they are inevitably tied to a specific person.

No age verification policy will succeed without the political will and policy appetite to blacklist sites that do not comply. For sites based in the UK, the government will have greater ability to threaten them with legal action or closure. But for adult sites outside the UK, sanctions become far more difficult. The most direct route would be blacklisting sites at ISPs the way that the UK government is dealing with torrent sites. This would result in the same problem as torrent blocking, though – mirror sites and other methods that easily evade the blacklists. However, large adult sites like PornHub could comply nonetheless because it might hurt them enough economically. The real question is what happens when the UK porn-consuming public wakes up to find their porn sites blocked and the need to register with a third party to see their favourite stimuli? Will politicians and regulators be able to stomach the inevitable backlash?

Since the policy goal of extending age controls for pornography into the online world is not new, it’s arguable that Sajid Javid’s announcement is an attempt to stir up the party’s voting base in a calculated “Won’t someone think of the children?!” play prior to the election. The political cost of making that promise is low – keeping it is another matter.

Dr Gilad Rosner is a visiting researcher at the Horizon Digital Economy Research Institute.

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Here’s why nothing – and no one – can stop me running up and down escalators

It’s official: standing on busy escalators is faster than walking up (or down) them.

Yes, it’s official: standing on busy escalators is faster than walking up (or down) them. Research undertaken by my favourite local transport provider, Transport for London, has conclusively proved that if people stand on both sides of the escalator during peak travel times, the numbers carried can increase by as much as a third.

Well, for once that’s a piece of good crowd news in our febrile and fissiparous world, guiding us towards sensible mass behaviour of a type to appal Yevgeny Zamyatin: think We, people, not a Beckettian I. TfL’s aim is to introduce standing-only escalators at some of its busiest and deepest stations in order to cut down on congestion.

The idea that plonking yourself on an escalator like an inert potato is faster than walking obviously seems absurd if you’re a limber fellow like me, who cannot see a long escalator without wanting to sprint up it or trip lightly down, sole after sole barely glancing the groovy tread – but of course the vast number of London Tube passengers are morbidly obese tourists humping ectomorphic wheelie bags, and such is their aversion to exercise that they clutter up the subterranean halls waiting for a tread to stand on.

Moreover, according to the escalator-flow wonks at TfL, passengers also jealously guard their personal space, often not using up all the treads available, but insisting on at least one between them and the next tubby traveller.

So, from now on, using just signage and other info-bumf, TfL will instruct its passengers at a number of the busiest stations in London to stand on both sides of the escalator. According to the aptly named Peter McNaught, operations director at London Underground: “Anyone who wants to walk on the other escalators will be free to do so, but we hope that with record numbers using the Tube, customers will enjoy being part of this experiment to find the most efficient ways of getting around.”

To which the only possible reply is, “Go f**k yourself!” Because I’ve not only been running up and down crowded escalators for years, I also experience some of my wildest and most bacchanalian pleasure from elbowing aside anyone unfortunate enough to get in my way.

As any true Londoner (or city-dweller generally) knows, observing these mass-travel mores is what divides us thrusting rams from the baaing flocks of docile ewes. To take the escalator at a run is a badge of honour for a metropolitan type – it shows he or she is a force to be reckoned with, fully competent when it comes to navigating the urban millrace.

As I’m pounding up or down I like to cry out, “Excuse me!” even as I barge against unsuspecting shoulders, or kick small children into mid-air – this retrospective “warning” being, naturally, a stern admonition, and even a punishment. Yes, yes, I know my behaviour is obnoxious – I understand that on crowded public transport we should all try to rub along (metaphorically) – but as our cities grow more densely populated, and the pace of life grows more frenetic, we all have recourse to strategies that help us to feel the shape of our individuality amidst the crush.

So, Mr McNaught, your signage and info-bumf will avail you naught. I intend to go on escalator-yomping for as long as my legs hold out. Other folk imagine that by piping pop into their inner ears, or fixedly playing Candy Crush as they bumble along, they’re somehow mitigating the ugly reality of being just a number, not a name, but to those of us who view the Tube as a psychic assault course, they’re clearly out of the running: mere drones, waiting for some operations director or other to tell them what to say, and think, and, of course, do.

(And apropos Candy Crush, has anyone else noticed the strange similarity between these streams of cascading and intermittently exploding citrus fruits, and the flows of underground passengers on, er, escalators? People are pretty scathing about Candy Crush, but a reasonable case can be made for it being the legitimate art form of mass transit systems for precisely this reason.)

Not only will I continue running on escalators, but I’m going to persist in sprinting on travelators. You can really get up speed on a travelator! And when the wooden passengers fly every which way out of your path, the similarity to a ten-pin bowling alley is most pleasing. I often used to go to Paris just in order to run full pelt along the notorious trottoir roulant rapide installed in the Montparnasse-Bienvenüe Métro station. I like to think my bullish runs alone contributed to some of the injuries that led to its being replaced by a boring old one that runs at 2.9 kilometres an hour.

Every child has experienced the sense of wonder that comes as you watch the once-solidly right-angled risers and treads mysteriously flattening under your flying feet, before disappearing into the steely maw – but if McNaught and his ilk have their way, future generations will be condemned to leaden passivity: standing there, watching the advertisements purl past. That’s the wet-look of capitalism. In Mr McNaught’s happy world all you have to do to progress is stand still.

Will Self is an author and journalist. His books include Umbrella, Shark, The Book of Dave and The Butt. He writes the Madness of Crowds and Real Meals columns for the New Statesman.

This article first appeared in the 31 March 2016 issue of the New Statesman, The terror trail