Every opinion piece you're about to read about the royal baby

In predictable fashion, anyone with a column to fill in the next week is going to write about the new royal arrival. Rafael Behr saves you the trouble of reading them.

It was a quiet news week and then a royal princess had a baby. Every columnist and commentator in the land will want a piece of the action. To save you some time, here is every opinion piece to be published in the coming days.

A moment of national joy to celebrate. Britain is champion country of the world

Patriotism by numbers with a passive aggressive hint that failure to be moved by a royal birth means there is something shrivelled and ugly about your soul.

This monarchist carnival proves that we are a Conservative country, which is a good thing

David Cameron spoke for us all when he said "congratulations." How dismal life must be for the tiny minority of joyless lefties shivering on the margins of our national identity.

This monarchist charade proves that we are a Conservative country, which is a bad thing

This is surely how Solzhenitsyn felt. We republicans are internal exiles and dissidents.

It just goes to show how class is dead

The Middletons are so middle class they even have “middle” in their name. What more proof do you need?

It just goes to show how class is alive and kicking

Oh Britain! How easily you are seduced into deference and feudalism.

This is the spawn of imperialism and don’t forget it

Hysterical rant about the evils of the British Establishment

Gotcha! Lefties hate babies – how dare Labour call itself compassionate

Gleeful denunciation of extreme republicans culminating in call for Ed Miliband to distance himself from a comment someone unconnected to the Labour party may have made on the internet.

He will be the Twitter King

Getting desperate now. What’s the social media angle?

He will not be the Twitter King

Oho, you all fell for the social media angle, but really this is a timeless thing that transcends faddish technology.

Leave the poor child and its parents alone

No-one should write about this anymore, apart from me and this, obviously.

 

 

The Sun's royal boy-baby frontpage. Photograph: Getty Images

Rafael Behr is political columnist at the Guardian and former political editor of the New Statesman

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Our union backed Brexit, but that doesn't mean scrapping freedom of movement

We can only improve the lives of our members, like those planning stike action at McDonalds, through solidarity.

The campaign to defend and extend free movement – highlighted by the launch of the Labour Campaign for Free Movement this month – is being seen in some circles as a back door strategy to re-run the EU referendum. If that was truly the case, then I don't think Unions like mine (the BFAWU) would be involved, especially as we campaigned to leave the EU ourselves.

In stark contrast to the rhetoric used by many sections of the Leave campaign, our argument wasn’t driven by fear and paranoia about migrant workers. A good number of the BFAWU’s membership is made up of workers not just from the EU, but from all corners of the world. They make a positive contribution to the industry that we represent. These people make a far larger and important contribution to our society and our communities than the wealthy Brexiteers, who sought to do nothing other than de-humanise them, cheered along by a rabid, right-wing press. 

Those who are calling for end to freedom of movement fail to realise that it’s people, rather than land and borders that makes the world we live in. Division works only in the interest of those that want to hold power, control, influence and wealth. Unfortunately, despite a rich history in terms of where division leads us, a good chunk of the UK population still falls for it. We believe that those who live and work here or in other countries should have their skills recognised and enjoy the same rights as those born in that country, including the democratic right to vote. 

Workers born outside of the UK contribute more than £328 million to the UK economy every day. Our NHS depends on their labour in order to keep it running; the leisure and hospitality industries depend on them in order to function; the food industry (including farming to a degree) is often propped up by their work.

The real architects of our misery and hardship reside in Westminster. It is they who introduced legislation designed to allow bosses to act with impunity and pay poverty wages. The only way we can really improve our lives is not as some would have you believe, by blaming other poor workers from other countries, it is through standing together in solidarity. By organising and combining that we become stronger as our fabulous members are showing through their decision to ballot for strike action in McDonalds.

Our members in McDonalds are both born in the UK and outside the UK, and where the bosses have separated groups of workers by pitting certain nationalities against each other, the workers organised have stood together and fought to win change for all, even organising themed social events to welcome each other in the face of the bosses ‘attempts to create divisions in the workplace.

Our union has held the long term view that we should have a planned economy with an ability to own and control the means of production. Our members saw the EU as a gravy train, working in the interests of wealthy elites and industrial scale tax avoidance. They felt that leaving the EU would give the UK the best opportunity to renationalise our key industries and begin a programme of manufacturing on a scale that would allow us to be self-sufficient and independent while enjoying solid trading relationships with other countries. Obviously, a key component in terms of facilitating this is continued freedom of movement.

Many of our members come from communities that voted to leave the EU. They are a reflection of real life that the movers and shakers in both the Leave and Remain campaigns took for granted. We weren’t surprised by the outcome of the EU referendum; after decades of politicians heaping blame on the EU for everything from the shape of fruit to personal hardship, what else could we possibly expect? However, we cannot allow migrant labour to remain as a political football to give succour to the prejudices of the uninformed. Given the same rights and freedoms as UK citizens, foreign workers have the ability to ensure that the UK actually makes a success of Brexit, one that benefits the many, rather than the few.

Ian Hodon is President of the Bakers and Allied Food Workers Union and founding signatory of the Labour Campaign for Free Movement.