70 per cent of the cost of cutting the personal allowance goes to the richest half of society

Income tax is quite progressive; better to cut VAT or council tax.

Tomorrow is the beginning of the 2013/2014 tax year, and one of the changes that's going through is the latest rise in the Personal Allowance, which is increasing from £8,105 to £9,440. The Tories are making a big thing of it, launching this poster campaign:

That's going to sting for the Liberal Democrats, who are desperate to claim the increased personal allowance as their legacy from this government. But the phrasing is interesting, and worth examining.

For this poster, the Conservatives have dropped their favourite claim of "2.7 million taken out of tax altogether". That's good, because as the FT's Chris Cook explains, it's not exactly true:

The poorest families are paying a lot more in indirect tax (VAT, fuel duty, booze taxes) than in direct tax (income tax, NICs, council tax). In fact, direct taxes only overtake indirect taxes in size when you hit the fifth decile.

If you look at the second decile of households by income, just over 10 per cent of the taxes they pay are income tax. The other 90 per cent of their tax burden – still over £4,000 a year – comes from various other taxes, principally council tax and VAT. Between them, those two taxes account for almost half the tax burden on that decile.

But while it might not be the case that the tax cut takes workers "out of tax", it certainly is a tax cut for 24 million people. But rather than being a positive, this is actually the biggest flaw in the policy. This chart, prepared by the Resolution Foundation (pdf), shows the distribution of that tax cut amongst houses of different incomes:

As the chart clearly shows, the families with the biggest cash gain are the third richest tenth in the country, who get £210 each; and the families with the biggest proportional gain are the fifth richest tenth, gaining an extra 0.61 per cent of their income.

Meanwhile, the poorest families barely benefit from the rise at all. That's unsurprising; you need to be earning at least £8,105 a year for the rise to help you in any way, and at least £9,440 to gain the full benefit. And in a household, that needs to be true of both earners – otherwise half the allowance is wasted.

The chart also lets us get an idea of the distribution of the costs of the rise. Almost exactly 70 per cent of the revenue being forfeit for the increase in the allowance comes from the richest half of the nation. Less than 1 per cent of the money actually goest to the poorest ten per cent in the country.

The truth is that income tax in Britain is already one of the most progressive taxes we've got. The poorest in the nation pay little, while the richest pay most of their tax in income tax. As a result, if you want to cut taxes to help the poor, you would be better off returning VAT to its old rate of 17.5 per cent or increasing – rather than reducing – the number of people exempt from council tax. If you want to cut taxes to help the rich, going after income tax is the right way to do it.

Alex Hern is a technology reporter for the Guardian. He was formerly staff writer at the New Statesman. You should follow Alex on Twitter.

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If there’s no booze or naked women, what’s the point of being a footballer?

Peter Crouch came out with one of the wittiest football lines. When asked what he thought he would have been but for football, he replied: “A virgin.”

At a professional league ground near you, the following conversation will be taking place. After an excellent morning training session, in which the players all worked hard, and didn’t wind up the assistant coach they all hate, or cut the crotch out of the new trousers belonging to the reserve goalie, the captain or some senior player will go into the manager’s office.

“Hi, gaffer. Just thought I’d let you know that we’ve booked the Salvation Hall. They’ll leave the table-tennis tables in place, so we’ll probably have a few games, as it’s the players’ Christmas party, OK?”

“FECKING CHRISTMAS PARTY!? I TOLD YOU NO CHRISTMAS PARTIES THIS YEAR. NOT AFTER LAST YEAR. GERROUT . . .”

So the captain has to cancel the booking – which was actually at the Salvation Go Go Gentlemen’s Club on the high street, plus the Saucy Sporty Strippers, who specialise in naked table tennis.

One of the attractions for youths, when they dream of being a footballer or a pop star, is not just imagining themselves number one in the Prem or number one in the hit parade, but all the girls who’ll be clambering for them. Young, thrusting politicians have similar fantasies. Alas, it doesn’t always work out.

Today, we have all these foreign managers and foreign players coming here, not pinching our women (they’re too busy for that), but bringing foreign customs about diet and drink and no sex at half-time. Rotters, ruining the simple pleasures of our brave British lads which they’ve enjoyed for over a century.

The tabloids recently went all pious when poor old Wayne Rooney was seen standing around drinking till the early hours at the England team hotel after their win over Scotland. He’d apparently been invited to a wedding that happened to be going on there. What I can’t understand is: why join a wedding party for total strangers? Nothing more boring than someone else’s wedding. Why didn’t he stay in the bar and get smashed?

Even odder was the behaviour of two other England stars, Adam Lallana and Jordan Henderson. They made a 220-mile round trip from their hotel in Hertfordshire to visit a strip club, For Your Eyes Only, in Bournemouth. Bournemouth! Don’t they have naked women in Herts? I thought one of the points of having all these millions – and a vast office staff employed by your agent – is that anything you want gets fixed for you. Why couldn’t dancing girls have been shuttled into another hotel down the road? Or even to the lads’ own hotel, dressed as French maids?

In the years when I travelled with the Spurs team, it was quite common in provincial towns, after a Saturday game, for players to pick up girls at a local club and share them out.

Like top pop stars, top clubs have fixers who can sort out most problems, and pleasures, as well as smart solicitors and willing police superintendents to clear up the mess afterwards.

The England players had a night off, so they weren’t breaking any rules, even though they were going to play Spain 48 hours later. It sounds like off-the-cuff, spontaneous, home-made fun. In Wayne’s case, he probably thought he was doing good, being approachable, as England captain.

Quite why the other two went to Bournemouth was eventually revealed by one of the tabloids. It is Lallana’s home town. He obviously said to Jordan Henderson, “Hey Hendo, I know a cool club. They always look after me. Quick, jump into my Bentley . . .”

They spent only two hours at the club. Henderson drank water. Lallana had a beer. Don’t call that much of a night out.

In the days of Jimmy Greaves, Tony Adams, Roy Keane, or Gazza in his pomp, they’d have been paralytic. It was common for players to arrive for training still drunk, not having been to bed.

Peter Crouch, the former England player, 6ft 7in, now on the fringes at Stoke, came out with one of the wittiest football lines. When asked what he thought he would have been but for football, he replied: “A virgin.”

Hunter Davies is a journalist, broadcaster and profilic author perhaps best known for writing about the Beatles. He is an ardent Tottenham fan and writes a regular column on football for the New Statesman.

This article first appeared in the 01 December 2016 issue of the New Statesman, Age of outrage