Friday Arts Diary

Our cultural picks for the week ahead.

Cinema

Made in Britain: Warp Films at 10, British Film Institute, London, 19-30 April
April features a BFI celebration of 10 years of contemporary British cinema from a company behind several iconic stories. Continuing an annual exploration of British Cinema, last year centered on female directors, this time the focus is on the productions of Warp Films. Founded in 2001 the company has produced among others This is England and Dead Man’s Shoes. There will also be a Film Masterclass available for the aspiring cinematographers.

 

Concert

Petrenko conducts in Warwick, Warwick Arts Centre, Coventry CV4 7AL, 24 April
Conductor Vasily Petrenko and Nikolai Lugansky on piano present an all-Russian evening with Tchaikovsky's First, Liadov’s Enchanted Lake and Prokofiev’s Fifth. Among the most respected piano concertos these pieces have been described as virtuoso Cossack-rides and fairytales of reality escape. Petrenko is the Chief Conductor of the Royal Liverpool Philharmonic Orchestra and Lugansky won the 2011 BBC Music Magazine Awards in the Chamber Music category.

 

Theatre

The day I swapped my dad for two goldfish, Beacon Arts Centre, Greenock PA15 1HJ, 25 – 27 April
Neil Gaiman and Dave McKean have had another picture book turned theatre with The Day I Swapped My Dad For Two Goldfish. Following the success of The Wolves in the Walls in 2006 the play explores what happens when a spur of the moment decision turns bad and snowsballs out of control. Appropriate for anyone aged 6 or up. Created and directed by Lu Kemp and Abigail Docherty and written by Oliver Emanuel.
 

Television

The Wright Way, BBC1, Starts 23 April
A new sitcom by Ben Elton, The Wright Way stars David Haig as Gerald Wright from Baselricky Council Health & Safety Department. He tries in vain to manage his hopeless team and avoid causing the catastrophes they are meant to prevent. A biting look on bureaucracy and office incompetence from the man responsible for the Blackadder series and The Young Ones. Also starring Mina Anwar, Kacey Ainsworth, Joanne Matthews, and Robert Daws.

 

Exhibition

The Dairy Art Centre, London WC1N 1PG, opens 24 April
Former-milk-depot-turned-art-gallery The Dairy will host its inaugural exhibition of avant-garde pop culture mix from Swiss artist John Armleder. His art is described as “a celebration of reality in its everyday and most commonplace manifestations.” Not-for-profit and free for all the 12,500 sq ft centre will feature the projects chosen by collectors Frank Cohen and Nicolai Frahm. Having worked together for over 15 years the couple and collaborated and collected with many of the most prolific artists, they have called the dairy a “kunsthalle”, a space where the artworld and the public can come together.
A new play based on one of Neil Gaiman's books will premiere in Scotland. Photo: Darryl James/Getty Images
BBC/ ITV Cradle Ltd/Matt Squire
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Is Danny Baker a “bona fide genius”? Not in his new show

The clichéd decade: Cradle to Grave and Danny and the Human Zoo reviewed.

I’m not qualified to rule on whether or not Danny Baker is, as the newspapers insist, a “bona fide genius”; I gave up listening to the ever more blokeish BBC Radio 5 Live a while ago, and I’m too young to remember the supposedly fantastic pieces he delivered to the NME back in the day (I read that they were even more amazing than those of Tony Parsons, which is saying something, isn’t it?). But I can tell you this: his new autobiographical comedy series, Cradle to Grave (Thursdays, BBC2, 9pm), displays no evidence at all of his talents, brilliant or otherwise. Anecdotes that just peter out. Jokes that fail to hit home. Misplaced nostalgia. Honestly, what’s the point? If you want 1974 – and quite a lot of us seem to, if the performance of Jeremy Corbyn is anything to judge by – you’d be better off treating yourself to a box set of the eternally satisfying Whatever Happened to the Likely Lads?.

The series, co-written with Jeff Pope, is based on Baker’s memoir Going to Sea in a Sieve. It’s 1974, and Danny (Laurie Kynaston) is a randy teenager who still lives at home in good old Bermondsey with his ducking and diving docker dad, Fred, aka Spud (Peter Kay), his kindly mum, Bet (Lucy Speed), and his older sister, Sharon (Alice Sykes). A voice-over tells us, in effect, to forget all about the nasty old three-day week and to consider instead the warmth of lovely south-east London. How decent its people are, how eager to try out newfangled consumer goods such as the continental quilts Spud has pilfered and which now fill the hall of his tiny house like clouds. (Correct: he’s basically Del Boy, minus the Robin Reliant, the cocktail bar and, fatally, the workmanlike jokes.)

The denizens of Bermondsey are not, you understand, quite ready for the new world. In this part of London, bomb sites remain, merrily sprouting buddleia and pink willow herb; men are men and women are women. Spud is horrified to discover that his daughter’s new boyfriend wears – wait for it – white plimsolls, though not quite so horrified as Danny is to find a stranger’s ­penis flapping exuberantly against his cheek when he goes up west to see Hair (needless to say, our Danny was in search of naked girls, not sweaty blokes). If you find this kind of thing funny and (I can hardly bear to write the words) “heart-warming”, then you have seven weeks of bliss ahead. Who knows? Perhaps the characters will go on to debate the virtues of the various flavours of Old English Spangles. But I can’t believe that many people will be so easily pleased. Those who are old enough to remember the Seventies will know that the best of the decade’s own comedy was ten times more sophisticated than this, and those who aren’t – those who have never had anything other than a duvet on their bed, and can locate a naked female or even a flapping male member with just one tap of their mobile – will simply watch something altogether more grown-up on Netflix.

Kascion Franklin (centre) on BBC1. Photo: BBC/RED

Unfathomable BBC scheduling (is it having some kind of John Whittingdale-induced nervous breakdown?) treated us to two doses of 1974 as the summer limped to an end. The second loving spoonful came in the form of Danny and the Human Zoo (31 August, BBC1, 9pm), an almost-biopic drama in which Lenny Henry told the story of his painful start in comedy.

My TV critic colleagues have all been most respectful but, lovely as Kascion Franklin’s performance in the lead role was, I couldn’t altogether get with the show. Unlike Baker, Henry certainly wiped the Vaseline from the lens: his version of the Seventies was clear-eyed, particularly in the matter of racism. But his tendency as a writer is to tell rather than show, which becomes wearying, and the narrative he offered us – success on the New Faces talent show, followed by the self-loathing that came of joining the Black and White Minstrels – wasn’t exactly unfamiliar. An unscrupulous manager with bad hair; parents who think their son should get a “proper” job but are secretly oh-so-proud; Mud’s “Tiger Feet” and Alice Cooper’s “School’s Out” on the soundtrack: such TV clichés really should be illegal by now.

Rachel Cooke trained as a reporter on The Sunday Times. She is now a writer at The Observer. In the 2006 British Press Awards, she was named Interviewer of the Year.

This article first appeared in the 03 September 2015 issue of the New Statesman, Pope of the masses