“It is in no way tax avoidance" - quote of the day

Npower has admitted to paying zero corporation tax between 2009 and 2011.

One of Britain’s big six energy companies, Npower, has admitted to paying zero corporation tax between 2009 and 2011, as it pumped billions in to keeping “the UK's lights on"

Speaking at the energy and climate change select committee yesterday, Npower chief executive Paul Massara defended the energy giant’s tax practices, saying “it is in no way tax avoidance, and all of our business is taxable in the UK".

"Effectively we have invested £5bn in the last five years building power plants, creating jobs, creating employment and helping to keep the lights on.

"If we had not made that investment, we would not have the deductibility that we would be allowed. That is a simple accounting UK rule,” Massara told the MPs.

Npower reported a 34 per cent rise in profits to £413m last year.

The energy companies were called before the MPs in the light of worsening public trust in them, as their profits rise but household bills rocket.

Labour MP Ian Lavery said, "In the last three years, [Npower] has reported profits totalling £766m – yet today they admitted they have not paid a single penny of corporation tax over that period. 

"People who pay their taxes unquestioningly are sick and tired of seeing hugely profitable companies use every trick in the book to get out of contributing their fair share."

Another Labour MP, John Robertson, urged consumers to switch energy providers in protest, dubbing Npower “the new Starbucks”.

However, Andrew Watters, a partner in Thomas Eggar LLP, condemned this "current name and shame approach".

"It seems to be a modern version of the ducking chair where the accused is ducked until they accept guilt, or drowns (a sure sign of guilt). Some people see the new General Anti Avoidance Rule (GAAR) as the way to clarify how morality and law interact. Let us hope the GAAR Advisory Committee has at least one member called Solomon."

This story first appeared on economia

Photograph: Getty Images
Newsgroup Newspapers Ltd/Published with permission
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Everything that is wonderful about The Sun’s HMS Global Britain Brexit boat

And all who sail in her.

Just when you’d suffered a storm called Doris, spotted a sad Ukip man striding around the Potteries in top-to-toe tweed, watched 60 hours of drama about the Queen being a Queen and thought Britain couldn’t get any more Brexity, The Sun on Sunday has launched a boat called HMS Global Britain.


Photo: Newsgroup Newspapers Ltd/Photos published with permission from The Sun

Taking its name from one of Theresa May’s more optimistic characterisations of the UK post-Europe (it’s better than “Red, white and blue Brexit”, your mole grants), this poor abused vessel is being used by the weekend tabloid to host a gaggle of Brexiteers captained by Michael Gove – and a six-foot placard bearing the terms of Article 50.

Destination? Bloody Brussels, of course!

“Cheering MPs boarded HMS Global Britain at Westminster before waving off our message on a 200-mile voyage to the heart of the EU,” explains the paper. “Our crew started the journey at Westminster Pier to drive home the clear message: ‘It’s full steam ahead for Brexit.’”

Your mole finds this a wonderful spectacle. Here are the best bits:

Captain Michael Gove’s rise to power

The pinnacle of success in Brexit Britain is to go from being a potential Prime Minister to breaking a bottle of champagne against the side of a boat with a fake name for a publicity stunt about the policy you would have been enacting if you’d made it to Downing Street. Forget the experts! This is taking back control!


 

“God bless her, and all who sail in her,” he barks, smashing the bottle as a nation shudders.

The fake name

Though apparently photoshopped out of some of the stills, HMS Global Britain’s real name is clear in The Sun’s footage of the launch. It is actually called The Edwardian, its name painted proudly in neat, white lettering on its hull. Sullied by the plasticky motorway pub sign reading “HMS Global Britain” hanging limply from its deck railings. Poor The Edwardian. Living in London and working a job that involves a lot of travel, it probably voted Remain. It probably joined the Lib Dems following the Article 50 vote. It doesn’t want this shit.

The poses

All the poses in this picture are excellent. Tory MP Julian Brazier’s dead-eyed wave, the Demon Headmaster on his holidays. Former education minister Tim Loughton wearing an admiral’s hat and toting a telescope, like he dreamed of as a little boy. Tory MP Andrea Jenkyns’ Tim Henman fist of regret. Labour MP Kate Hoey’s cheeky grin belied by her desperately grasping, steadying hand. Former Culture Secretary John Whittingdale’s jolly black power salute. And failed Prime Ministerial candidate Michael Gove – a child needing a wee who has proudly found the perfect receptacle.

The metaphor

In a way, this is the perfect representation of Brexit. Ramshackle, contrived authenticity, unclear purpose, and universally white. But your mole isn’t sure this was the message intended by its sailors… the idea of a Global Britain may well be sunk.

I'm a mole, innit.