It's a (sigh) Valentine's Day massacre

GDP down worldwide.

Well, everyone agrees today is a Valentine's Day massacre, with growth slashed (or, I suppose, riddled with bullets) worldwide.

  • In Japan, GDP shrunk by 0.1 per cent in the last quarter against expectations of 0.1 per cent growth.
  • In Germany, GDP contracted by 0.6 per cent in the last quarter.
  • In France, it fell by 0.3 per cent over the same period.
  • In Italy, by 0.9 per cent.
  • Portugal declined by 1.8 per cent.
  • In Greece, GDP is reported in comparison with the same quarter in the previous year. The level at the end of Q4 2012 was 6 per cent lower than in Q4 2011.
  • The Eurozone as a whole contracted by 0.6 per cent, worse than expectations of a 0.4 per cent contraction.

That's the worst performance in almost four years for the Eurozone, and an alarming decline on even the post-crisis trend, as this chart from Natixis Asset Management's Philippe Waechter, via Business Insider, shows:

 

Not a very happy Valentine's day for most of Europe, then.

The valentine's day massacre. Photograph: Getty Images

Alex Hern is a technology reporter for the Guardian. He was formerly staff writer at the New Statesman. You should follow Alex on Twitter.

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Appreciate the full horror of Nigel Farage's pro-Trump speech

The former Ukip leader has appeared at a Donald Trump rally. It went exactly as you would expect.

It is with a heavy heart that I must announce Nigel Farage is at it again.

The on-again, off-again Ukip leader and current Member of the European Parliament has appeared at a Donald Trump rally to lend his support to the presidential candidate.

It was, predictably, distressing.

Farage started by telling his American audience why they, like he, should be positive.

"I come to you from the United Kingdom"

Okay, good start. Undeniably true.

"– with a message of hope –

Again, probably quite true.

Image: Clearly hopeful (Wikipedia Screenshot)

– and optimism.”

Ah.

Image: Nigel Farage in front of a poster showing immigrants who are definitely not European (Getty)

He continues: “If the little people, if the real people–”

Wait, what?

Why is Trump nodding sagely at this?

The little people?

Image: It's a plane with the name Trump on it (Wikimedia Commons)

THE LITTLE PEOPLE?

Image: It's the word Trump on the side of a skyscraper I can't cope with this (Pixel)

THE ONLY LITTLE PERSON CLOSE TO TRUMP IS RIDING A MASSIVE STUFFED LION

Image: I don't even know what to tell you. It's Trump and his wife and a child riding a stuffed lion. 

IN A PENTHOUSE

A PENTHOUSE WHICH LOOKS LIKE LIBERACE WAS LET LOOSE WITH THE GILT ON DAY FIVE OF A PARTICULARLY BAD BENDER

Image: So much gold. Just gold, everywhere.

HIS WIFE HAS SO MANY BAGS SHE HAS TO EMPLOY A BAG MAN TO CARRY THEM

Image: I did not even know there were so many styles of Louis Vuitton, and my dentists has a lot of old copies of Vogue.

Anyway. Back to Farage, who is telling the little people that they can win "against the forces of global corporatism".

 

Image: Aaaaarggghhhh (Wikipedia Screenshot)

Ugh. Okay. What next? Oh god, he's telling them they can have a Brexit moment.

“... you can beat Washington...”

“... if enough decent people...”

“...are prepared to stand up against the establishment”

Image: A screenshot from Donald Trump's Wikipedia page.

I think I need a lie down.

Watch the full clip here:

Stephanie Boland is digital assistant at the New Statesman. She tweets at @stephanieboland