Politics 29 October 2012 The ADgenda: No. 7 discovers what colour your face is Know thyself. Sign up for our weekly email * Print HTML Adverts are designed to make us question the things we see as important, and enlighten us with what we actually need. We didn’t know that shiny new hot-plate holder was a matter of life and death, but it is, and if we don’t buy all those Swiss army-style attachments, our lives are purposeless. No 7 has put out a new gadget designed to tell you the colour of your skin. Of course; it’s so simple! This is what we’ve always needed. Finally, I can discover what colour my face is! They’ve made more than just a make-up product here: this device should be sold to the army and kept a national secret. For it has unfathomable power; No 7 have put an end to the human philosophical struggle of who we are, and cracked the code of the ancient message at the Delphic Oracle “know thyself”. We never know when humanity might need this to combat an existential crisis. This is the message they employ in their advert. We see a woman working, looking agitated, bursting out of the enclosing walls of her office at the first possible opportunity, stumbling in her concealed excitement, until finally she unlocks the true meaning of her life – her face colour. The nation heaves a sigh of relief as she escapes the pointlessness of a job to receive the true enlightenment of perfect make-up. The fates smile upon humanity as they watch poor, deluded Woman finally achieve the goals of her gender. Now, with the message unlocked, they transmit the epistle down, soon to be adopted by our omniscient No 7 PR agency: value female appearance before female careers › China's People's Daily plagiarises article attacking NYT for plagiarism New gadget. Photograph: Getty Images Subscribe from just £1 per issue More Related articles Jeremy Corbyn has found a vulnerable spot on Theresa May and trade Politicians are worried that their pensions are destroying the planet. Is yours? Nap Store: Where did all these new mattress start-ups come from?