Tomas, James Palumbo
Quartet, 226pp, £10
What drives a 46-year-old superclub CEO to write a satirical novel? Not money and not, in the case of the Ministry of Sound co-founder James Palumbo, cultural approval: for Tomas replaces the conventions of the literary novel with something altogether more slapstick.
Despite its evident ambition, this tale of a French playboy-messiah and his hooker girlfriend stumbles. The characterisation is flat and the plot bare; the prose is dull and the cultural references clumsy - bankers are pigs, football stars are rapists, trophy wives have fake tits, and the world's most popular documentary channel is called Shit TV.
Palumbo might have meant Tomas to serve as a critique of modernity, yet he is too ready to wallow in tabloid excess and sexual violence to land any blows. Though some of the passages on high finance are good, and the final 20 pages pretty jaunty, it is hard to imagine this finding a sympathetic audience. The author shouldn't give up the night job.
Alex Rayner
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