The Staggers

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Christine O’Donnell is not a witch . . . She’s you

O’Donnell’s latest campaign video is bizarre, terrifying and utterly enthralling.

By Duncan Robinson Published 06 October 2010 14:20

Christine O'Donnell has released her latest campaign advert. Staring into the camera with doe eyes and a grin like burning phosphorus, O'Donnell lays out her pitch for the Senate.

It starts bizarrely, with O'Donnell stating: "I am not a witch." On balance, this is a good thing. Witchcraft might have its advantages ("I'll make the deficit disappear -- IN A PUFF OF SMOKE!") but when your base is the Christian right, I suppose the occult is a liability.

As far as reassuring electoral slogans go, however, "I'm not a witch" ranks up there with "I'm not a drunk" or "I don't hit my wife". If Barack Obama had plumped for "I'm not a wizard" rather than "Yes we can", he would probably -- actually, scratch that -- hopefully still be stuck in the Senate.

The advert takes a metaphysical twist when O'Donnell adds cryptically: "I'm nothing you've heard. I'm you." (Unless of course, you happen be a witch. In which case she definitely isn't you. She's not a witch. She really wants to make that clear.) Apparently there is a little bit of Christine in all of us. This means that, via the wonders of democracy, you too could join the Senate, with O'Donnell as your avatar.

O'Donnell has turned herself into the vanguard of the anti-intelligence movement. "I'll go to Washington and I'd do what you would do." No need for the avatar; O'Donnell is your average Joe. After all, she points out: "None of us are perfect." So why not elect me? Heck, anyone else would probably make a hash of it, too, so give me a crack.

Will Bunch sums up the thinking eloquently.

I'm reminded of a famous line from the back at the dawn of the age of resentment back in 1970 when a GOP senator named Roman Hruska argued for a lame Richard Nixon Supreme Court nominee by saying: "There are a lot of mediocre judges and people and lawyers. They are entitled to a little representation, aren't they?"

Scarily, according to Bunch, playing the anti-intelligence card could be a rather good idea:

"I'm you" is pitch perfect for this throw-the-eggheads-out election. It probably won't work for O'Donnell, not in the politically hen-blue state of Delaware, but it may work for a generation of pols from Nevada to Kentucky who will govern at least like they think that "you" would -- with very serious consequences for America for many, many years to come.

The advert lasts barely 30 seconds but it stays with you. Her grin, her eyes, her words all wash over you as a tinkling lullaby plays in the background. It's almost hypnotic. It's certainly terrifying. Watch it.

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20 comments

Thu, 2010-10-07 14:36 — Stuart Eels (not verified)

I'll tell you what, she's a fine looking woman, I'd vote for her!!!!!!!!!!

Thu, 2010-10-07 14:52 — Zole (not verified)

Yeah, but Stuart you'd vote for anyone in a black dress and a string of pearls.

Fri, 2010-10-08 13:55 — Chris (not verified)

Not the Chris who posted above.

"None of us are perfect", she says. Well, her grammar certainly isn't!

She looks like Palin - are they related? I'm disappointed that she denies being a witch though. A witch in the Senate would be better for the country than someone who is clearly mad.

Thu, 2010-10-07 18:12 — Stuart Eels (not verified)

Only a woman!

Thu, 2010-10-07 20:08 — triedeinsursE

"Isn't she unmarried? Living in sin, or/and kicks with the other foot?"

To be single, shacked up, or gay, if that is the case, has nothing to do with her politics. Really Ehtch, is this your best? The pendulum has swung and in a few weeks it will go right through the right-hand side of the clock and into the wall. Look at the lot of you. Name calling like a bunch of naughty children. She is intelligent and beautiful, now get over it. The times they are a changing. I hope ya’al get used to it.

Wed, 2010-10-06 23:00 — jeremiah

She may not be a witch, but she is quite clearly mental!

Thu, 2010-10-07 21:11 — Chris (not verified)

"God may choose to heal someone from cancer, yet that person still has a great deal of medical bills. The outstanding bills do not determine whether or not the patient has been healed by God."

"I consider myself an authentic feminist. Not as defined by the modern movement. And, let me clarify that a little bit more. I was an English major, so break it down: -ist means one who celebrates. As a feminist, I celebrate my femininity."

"You know what, evolution is a myth. Why aren't monkeys still evolving into humans?"

"I am not a clone of Sarah Palin. I have my own thoughts."

"It is not enough to be abstinent with other people, you also have to be abstinent alone. The Bible says that lust in your heart is committing adultery. You can't masturbate without lust!"

"[H]omosexuals [are] getting away with nudity! They're getting away with lasciviousness! They're getting away with perversion!"

"America is now a socialist economy. The definition of a socialist economy is when 50% or more your economy is dependent on the federal government."

"Drag queen balls celebrate the type of lifestyle which leads to the disease AIDS."

"Well, creationism, in essence, is believing that the world began as the Bible in Genesis says, that God created the Earth in six days, six 24-hour periods. And there is just as much, if not more, evidence supporting that."

"American scientific companies are cross-breeding humans and animals and coming up with mice with fully functioning human brains."

Thu, 2010-10-07 22:43 — triedeinsursE

""American scientific companies are cross-breeding humans and animals and coming up with mice with fully functioning human brains."

Just what we need. A new batch of cheese munching Democrats.

Thu, 2010-10-07 22:53 — triedeinsursE

"You know what, evolution is a myth. Why aren't monkeys still evolving into humans?"

Have you had a look at Nancy Pelosi lately?

"I am not a clone of Sarah Palin. I have my own thoughts."

You can say that again.

"It is not enough to be abstinent with other people, you also have to be abstinent alone. The Bible says that lust in your heart is committing adultery. You can't masturbate without lust!"

Do wet dreams enter the equation?

Thu, 2010-10-07 03:52 — Chris (not verified)

What the fuck is it with right wing loony women and pearl necklaces?

If that mad neo-thatcherite gets elected will the last one to leave Delaware please turn out the lights.

Thu, 2010-10-07 04:18 — jie4v7i14

Chris, ha-har-har-hah, tidy, brilliant, bluddy brilliant.

Wed, 2010-10-27 00:16 — Jonathan (not verified)

Why a Senator for Congress as your first gig in politics? Why not a senator for the state? She would have done better if she actually was working in government, but to start off as a senator for congress. Nope.