Does Cameron really stink of fish?

Quote of the campaign, says Guffwatch!

I just spied this on the BBC News live feed:

1337: You can't please everybody, it seems, even when you work right through the night. When David Cameron and his entourage met junior school children in Calverton, Nottinghamshire, one pupil blurted out: "You all smell of fish." Clearly, the tell-tale signs of that earlier visit to the fish market in Grimsby are still lingering.

Definitely, without even a momentary shadow of a doubt, Guffwatch's favourite moment of the 2010 election campaign. Child, whoever you are, in one swoop you have expressed the suspicions of a nation. I've long thought most things about Cambo were a bit fishy, but would never have dared express it quite so eloquently.

Also, the King of Children, as said child shall now be known, gave a masterclass in guff-free speech. Take note, you legion of guff-prone politicians. Say it how it is. If the man smells of fish, tell him he smells of fish. This is essentially the Guffwatch motto.

Sophie Elmhirst is features editor of the New Statesman

Getty
Show Hide image

Nigel Farage's exclusive Brexit plan has just been revealed and it's very telling

The panic is over.

If, a week on from Brexit, you're staring at the bottom of your gin bottle and wondering whether you'll ever afford to go on holiday again, then stop worrying. 

There's a plan.

Social media users have been sharing a link to an exclusive reveal of Nigel Farage's plan for the UK departure from the EU. Users are invited to: "View The Brexit Plan that was but together by the Vote Leave campaign, UKIP and Nigel Farage.

Here it is.

Highlighted policy topics include hot potatoes like UK access to the single market, international trade agreements and the rights of EU nationals working in the UK. You just have to click on the red button.

 

Oh. 

It seems the plan might be permanently out of reach. 

Every time you try to click on the red button with your mouse, you'll discover that it leaps away to another part of the page. So far, we haven't heard of anyone who has managed to catch the elusive button and discover the details of the brilliant plan. 

Other plans that have not been very easy to click on this week include: Boris Johnson's plan to be Prime Minister, Jeremy Corbyn's plan to lead a unified Labour opposition and David Cameron's plan to win the EU referendum in the first place.

As it turns out, a week after Brexit we are still waiting for a definitive plan. In the meantime, you can read: