The Clegg/Cameron doorstep face-off

Why they can’t keep their hands off each other.

I want you to watch this video very carefully. And then again. And then maybe once more.

 

Have you ever seen so much hand action in your life? To start with, there's the classic handshake-plus-arm-grab from Nick Clegg. Solid, friendly, keen. Then the handshake hardens, becomes immobile, as though they're both playing chicken -- neither willing to let go first. I bet someone had a finger crushed at this point (although neither really seems the finger-crushing type).

There follows the genial back-tap by David Cameron, a classically patronising movement. But just when we've got used to the formation, up go their arms! It's like a Siamese wave! Or synchronised swimmers! They must have practised -- that kind of perfect execution doesn't come for free -- so symmetrical, balanced, rhythmic. And both, if you look closely, wearing that same clenched smile, the one that says: "Yup. Here we are. Pretty big day. And I'm responsible and serious, and ready to run this goddam country, in case you were wondering."

Quickly, and tellingly, we're back into competition -- neither wants to bring his arm down first, like two kids in a breath-holding contest, suffering agony in order to claim victory. And then the wonderful, clinching double-back-clap-and-wave manoeuvre, so often attempted, so rarely achieved.

They really excel themselves here. Yet still that element of competition -- if you clap my back, I'll clap yours just that much harder: I am the greater statesman, and this back-clap proves it once and for all!

Who wins? Well, it's clear, isn't it? Cameron swings back in with that final back-tap, which develops, outrageously, into a back-clasp, hardly ever attempted on these shores. He hasn't let go by the time the film ends -- I imagine they're still locked in that position as they embark on their first meeting, Cameron awkwardly refusing to surrender his puppet-holding clutch on Clegg's jacket.

Who would have thought 20 seconds of film could essentially tell you all you need to know about our new government?

Sophie Elmhirst is features editor of the New Statesman

Ukip's Nigel Farage and Paul Nuttall. Photo: Getty
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Is the general election 2017 the end of Ukip?

Ukip led the way to Brexit, but now the party is on less than 10 per cent in the polls. 

Ukip could be finished. Ukip has only ever had two MPs, but it held an outside influence on politics: without it, we’d probably never have had the EU referendum. But Brexit has turned Ukip into a single-issue party without an issue. Ukip’s sole remaining MP, Douglas Carswell, left the party in March 2017, and told Sky News’ Adam Boulton that there was “no point” to the party anymore. 

Not everyone in Ukip has given up, though: Nigel Farage told Peston on Sunday that Ukip “will survive”, and current leader Paul Nuttall will be contesting a seat this year. But Ukip is standing in fewer constituencies than last time thanks to a shortage of both money and people. Who benefits if Ukip is finished? It’s likely to be the Tories. 

Is Ukip finished? 

What are Ukip's poll ratings?

Ukip’s poll ratings peaked in June 2016 at 16 per cent. Since the leave campaign’s success, that has steadily declined so that Ukip is going into the 2017 general election on 4 per cent, according to the latest polls. If the polls can be trusted, that’s a serious collapse.

Can Ukip get anymore MPs?

In the 2015 general election Ukip contested nearly every seat and got 13 per cent of the vote, making it the third biggest party (although is only returned one MP). Now Ukip is reportedly struggling to find candidates and could stand in as few as 100 seats. Ukip leader Paul Nuttall will stand in Boston and Skegness, but both ex-leader Nigel Farage and donor Arron Banks have ruled themselves out of running this time.

How many members does Ukip have?

Ukip’s membership declined from 45,994 at the 2015 general election to 39,000 in 2016. That’s a worrying sign for any political party, which relies on grassroots memberships to put in the campaigning legwork.

What does Ukip's decline mean for Labour and the Conservatives? 

The rise of Ukip took votes from both the Conservatives and Labour, with a nationalist message that appealed to disaffected voters from both right and left. But the decline of Ukip only seems to be helping the Conservatives. Stephen Bush has written about how in Wales voting Ukip seems to have been a gateway drug for traditional Labour voters who are now backing the mainstream right; so the voters Ukip took from the Conservatives are reverting to the Conservatives, and the ones they took from Labour are transferring to the Conservatives too.

Ukip might be finished as an electoral force, but its influence on the rest of British politics will be felt for many years yet. 

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