Apple profits up 90 per cent, credibility down slightly

Jobs’ pet project takes shine off bumper quarter.

Apple enjoyed its best non-holiday quarter ever, with sales up 49 per cent and profits up a whopping 90 per cent. But it's gone all coy on just how many iPads it has shifted so far, and its failure to address iPad buyers' concerns has dismayed some of the most loyal Apple fans.

The shiny white gadget and computer maker sold 33 per cent more Macs than a year ago, 131 per cent more iPhones but 1 per cent fewer iPods.

It didn't give official figures for the number of iPads it has sold, saying that they went on sale after its latest financial quarter had ended, but the lack of detail may just be telling. It was happy to brag about selling 450,000 in the first five days they went on sale, but that was before news of their flaky Wi-Fi connectivity hit the media. We shall have to wait for its next set of results to see if it's going to give iPad sales figures.

So far Apple has also been characteristically quiet about the scores of complaints about iPad Wi-Fi lodged on its own discussion boards and technology blogs. There were nearly 600 comments posted about the issue on one thread alone.

It did post a support article which dealt with some users who couldn't get any Wi-Fi signal whatsoever, but those complaining of a very weak Wi-Fi signal or signals being dropped have been told to simply move nearer their wireless router or move their wireless router nearer to them.

"We're thrilled to report our best non-holiday quarter ever, with revenues up 49 per cent and profits up 90 per cent," said Steve Jobs, Apple's CEO. "We've launched our revolutionary new iPad and users are loving it, and we have several more extraordinary products in the pipeline for this year."

I always thought the 3G version of the iPad - which will give you true roaming capabilities - would be a far more compelling proposition than the Wi-Fi only model. Obviously now that the iconic company has managed a Wi-Fi tablet with iffy Wi-Fi, we must hope that its 3G version has decent 3G: otherwise you're going to be told to move nearer the mobile phone mast, or move the mast nearer to you.

Jason Stamper is technology correspondent for NS and editor of Computer Business Review.

Jason Stamper is editor of Computer Business Review

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Appreciate the full horror of Nigel Farage's pro-Trump speech

The former Ukip leader has appeared at a Donald Trump rally. It went exactly as you would expect.

It is with a heavy heart that I must announce Nigel Farage is at it again.

The on-again, off-again Ukip leader and current Member of the European Parliament has appeared at a Donald Trump rally to lend his support to the presidential candidate.

It was, predictably, distressing.

Farage started by telling his American audience why they, like he, should be positive.

"I come to you from the United Kingdom"

Okay, good start. Undeniably true.

"– with a message of hope –

Again, probably quite true.

Image: Clearly hopeful (Wikipedia Screenshot)

– and optimism.”

Ah.

Image: Nigel Farage in front of a poster showing immigrants who are definitely not European (Getty)

He continues: “If the little people, if the real people–”

Wait, what?

Why is Trump nodding sagely at this?

The little people?

Image: It's a plane with the name Trump on it (Wikimedia Commons)

THE LITTLE PEOPLE?

Image: It's the word Trump on the side of a skyscraper I can't cope with this (Pixel)

THE ONLY LITTLE PERSON CLOSE TO TRUMP IS RIDING A MASSIVE STUFFED LION

Image: I don't even know what to tell you. It's Trump and his wife and a child riding a stuffed lion. 

IN A PENTHOUSE

A PENTHOUSE WHICH LOOKS LIKE LIBERACE WAS LET LOOSE WITH THE GILT ON DAY FIVE OF A PARTICULARLY BAD BENDER

Image: So much gold. Just gold, everywhere.

HIS WIFE HAS SO MANY BAGS SHE HAS TO EMPLOY A BAG MAN TO CARRY THEM

Image: I did not even know there were so many styles of Louis Vuitton, and my dentists has a lot of old copies of Vogue.

Anyway. Back to Farage, who is telling the little people that they can win "against the forces of global corporatism".

 

Image: Aaaaarggghhhh (Wikipedia Screenshot)

Ugh. Okay. What next? Oh god, he's telling them they can have a Brexit moment.

“... you can beat Washington...”

“... if enough decent people...”

“...are prepared to stand up against the establishment”

Image: A screenshot from Donald Trump's Wikipedia page.

I think I need a lie down.

Watch the full clip here:

Stephanie Boland is digital assistant at the New Statesman. She tweets at @stephanieboland