Steven Baxter

Patrolling the murkier waters of the mainstream media

Syndicate contentRSS

This a Red or Black world. And I'm stuck in it.

If you're going to have a random show, make it a random show.

Chance is such a funny thing. Only the other day, I was politely written to by a potential employer and told that, while I had qualified to be shortlisted for a job, they'd picked the interviewees at random, and sadly I hadn't http://enemiesofreason.co.uk/2011/09/07/unlucky/)" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;" onkeypress="window.open(this.href);return false;">made the cut. My bingo ball hadn't come up. Such is life. This is the world of Red or Black?, the gameshow that everyone's talking about this week.

We're not really talking about it in a spectacularly good way, though. We're talking about it, saying "My god, I never knew television could be so bad." I had thought that, with Epic Win, the BBC had succeeded in doing the impossible - making an updated version of You Bet! that was even worse than the days of Brucie's sofa-chewingly execrable "don't fret, get set" rap, but no, this was worse.

This is everything about gameshows that vaguely involves skill, or knowledge, and boils it down to a binary choice: red or black, 0 or 1, on or off. "The show where luck, and luck alone, can win £1m," chirps Dec, as if it's something to be proud of. People cheer the lucky (or unlucky) wheel, which has its own, somewhat sinister, rococo leitmotif.

Luck, lucky, luck. That's all it is. It's not just me, surely, who finds something a little unsatisfying about that, something that verges on an insulting whiff of pointlessness.

When you're watching some gimp blunder through a gameshow's multiple choice with guesswork, at least you know there's something slightly better than total and utter blind chance deciding whether they're going to progress or not. They're making educated guesses. With Red or Black, you could just submit your guesses before the show. Red black red black black red. Save time.

It's easy, I suppose, to call a turkey a turkey. If it looks like a turkey, it's probably a turkey. And for the avoidance of doubt, I'd say this turkey is a turkey. Gobble gobble. But I'm more interested in the odd debate that sprung up this week about the morality - or otherwise - of letting a convicted criminal win a million pounds. The first winner was revealed to have been previously convicted of an assault, allegedly against a female victim, which led to a bit of red-top mock outrage about whether he should be allowed to have his cheque. That led to more background checks being done on contestants, and others being http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-14811555)" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;" onkeypress="window.open(this.href);return false;">sifted out.

I suppose we want to believe, wrongly, in some kind of natural justice. We don't like stories like the one about 'lotto rapist' Iorworth Hoare and we want to think that only the deserving will be winners, or should be allowed to be winners. But an awful lot of undeserving people luck out all the time, every day, in every field. It might be unpalatable, but there it is. Luck doesn't morally censure.

Personally, I think if you're going to have a random show, make it a random show. Don't hone it down to a few contestants who are spotless enough not to have embarrassing things in their pasts; open it up, wider, to people who've really done wrong. Robbers, muggers, paedophiles, all sorts. Imagine one of them with a big beaming grin as their lucky numbers come up.

That's luck. It doesn't care who you are; it just rewards the lucky.

 

8 comments

Freeman2's picture

'That's luck. It doesn't care who you are; it just rewards the lucky.'

I can just about remember when the 'New Statesman' was a bit socialist. In those days it would have described that system as 'capitalism'. Odd thought, isn't it? That the NS should once have been socialist I mean.

Ben's picture

I thought this when I read the BBC coverage. It seems that while he was convicted of assault, it was OK for him to keep his money.
As soon as everyone found out he had assaulted a woman though, he isn't allowed it.

Apparently a lot of gameshows won't have those with criminal records on at all. But in this case, if they haven't insisted their contestants have squeaky-clean pasts, and they haven't done their checks, then the resulting winner surely must be allowed to keep his money. If it isn't in the rules, you can't go deciding his financial future based on his criminal past.

earlydawn's picture

Why didn't ITV just put in a bid for the National Lottery show instead?

The most extraordinary thing about gameshows is that there is nothing actually at stake. Sure the winner may come out with something but they aren't losing anything if it goes wrong. I always found it interesting that Deal or No Deal tried to make a big issue out of someone failing to make a good deal when whatever happened they would leave with more than they came with, even if it was only 1p.

As a result, this (like the National Lottery) makes gambling look dangerously risk-free...

Yakoub's picture

My mate use to call this kind of tele, "prime time prole feed." I don't think it was intended as a classest statement. More a comment on the mindset of the people who make naff peak viewing programmes.

jhindsight's picture

It does seem strange that people would get all moral about a gameshow which is based on a gambling game. far more shocking to me was the xfactor plagiarising format (inspirational back stories to cack music, incessant crowd cheering and daft tronesque set dressings.

They did, however, succeed in the best way to deny someone money with a backflipping member of JLS pulling a rope.

grobs's picture

Dear Prisoner.

Even though your eligible for parole, we've shortlisted this month's parole interviewees at random, sadly you didn't make the cut, however, if you turn up at the canteen just after slopping out, there will be a raffle to see who gets the PS3 in their cell this week.

puzzled man's picture

Why is it ok if he assaulted a male but it is not ok because he assaulted a female what is the difference, have I missed something

Latest tweets