An elderly media tycoon and the not-so-humble pie
Murdoch's news-loving Spidey-sense still tingles.
By Steve Baxter Published 19 July 2011 21:07
So there it was, then. The defining moment of the Hackgate hearings was not a thundering "You can't handle the truth!" from one of the main players but a foamy pie splattering into the face of an elderly media tycoon.
As the faux-custard humiliation oozed down his face, perhaps Rupert Murdoch's news-loving Spidey-sense still tingled: he must have known, despite it all, that this was the only show in town, and his humbling, via a not-so-humble pie, was complete.
It's a messy kind of protest, chucking goo at someone you don't approve of, and quite often rather counterproductive.
Ted Heath got showered with red paint on his first day as Prime Minister in 1970 (remarking "That was a stupid thing to do, wasn't it?"), then splashed with ink outside the Palais d'Egmont in Brussels in 1972.
Peter Mandelson, of course, suffered a green custard sploshing at the hands of an outraged environmentalist in 2009, one of many food-chucking incidents of the New Labour era, which saw John Prescott egged, Nick Brown lunged at with a chocolate éclair and Tony Blair pelted with a tomato. Keep a straight face, please, because it's not funny, but Robert Kilroy-Silk had a bucket of slurry thrown over him.
Maybe there's a special course that politicians can go on where they learn how to maintain their dignity while they have foodstuffs lobbed at them; perhaps it's just a skill that comes with the territory.
There is a certain ability to be able to climb onto the moral high ground with relative certainty when one is enduring a custard onslaught -- though when the icy-cool mask slips, as it did with Prescott's memorable two-punch combo aimed at a protester in Rhyl, it needn't be a disaster either. People didn't mind Prezza going toe-to-toe with a man with an egg-hurling man in double denim; it seemed, in the public's imagination, that under such provocation, all ministerial decorum could be abandoned.
I know, by the way, that I'm talking about the pie, and that by talking about the pie, I detract from "the story", which is about everything other than the pie; by doing so, even with my minuscule readership, I run the risk of, in some small way, encouraging others to take up shaving foam and a cardboard plate when all else fails.
I understand this, but a pie to the face is still a pie to the face; there's no use pretending it didn't happen, when we all saw that it did.
I suppose I should say at this point that it's a demonstration of inarticulacy to pick up an egg, or a custard pie, rather than a keyboard, or a pen: and yes, it does give your target the chance to play the victim and accuse you of being incapable of using words to make your argument.
Mind you, the only way I think Murdoch could have won us over would be if he had secreted a pie of his own into the hearing, and launched it into his attacker's face as a pre-emptive strike. That would have been brilliant, but sadly it was not to be.
The pieing rounds off a truly miserable few days for Daddy Murdoch. His empire might not be collapsing around his ears, but it's not been a golden time either. But he can't let go, and is absorbing a huge amount of limelight since the collapse of the News of the World -- possibly to save his family, possibly because that's just the way he does things. It might even lead one to suspect he's almost rather enjoying the attention.
That grinning promenade with Rebekah Brooks was one thing; the paparazzi photos of his spindly legs in tiny 1980s athletics shorts, dangerously close to an upskirt moment, was another.
Perhaps it's a dirt-eating grin of someone who knows they are on the wrong end of a tanking; perhaps it's a defiance, in the face of all of it, from someone who believes he's more sinned against than sinning; or maybe it's just a smile from someone who knew all along that these days would one day come.
We'll never know, I suspect.
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8 comments
Great writing. Shit-eating tho :)
It does not surprise me that so many (such as If you're looking for an effective Yes2AV video) on the left seem to think that assulting an 80 year old man is ok?... the same kind of logic that supports "UK Uncut" and all the loony left
You know Stephen what I find quite amusing about this question and answer committee thing is how they are all light years behind us anonymous commentators in the way they question and answer.
I read Murdoch was banging his hand on the table! Was that play acting or losing your cool? I reckon you need someone to wind him up big time. Really wind him up.
I couldn't disagree more with the way TR characterises the hearings. They were a spectacular failure after Tom Watson. No other questioner discomfited the Murdochs at all, and none tried to.
Louise Mensch (whom he seems to think was a "sharp young woman" gave grandstanding speeches which conatined no substantive questions for the Murdochs to answer. She was so keen to broaden the scope of the inquiry to include her political enemies and get in some of Paul Staines' incorrect allegations that the Murdochs just had to sit and nod as she railed against The Mirror, making accusations that she was later unwilling to repeat without parliamentary privilege.
One MP used all of their questions trying to ascertain which door Murdoch had used when visiting 10 Downing Street.
And when Tom Watson was making progress, John Whittingdale (a Facebook friend of Rebekah Brooks) shut his questioning down.
They were a disgrace, and the only honest moment in hours was that bit with the pie. We weren't seeing great drama. We were seeing underprepared publicity hounds effectively stonewalled by the Murdochs.
The pie moment was one of the few moments of honesty during the afternoon.
Anyway, I've analysed the whole thing from a conclusion from a comedic perspective here: http://nathanieltapley.com/2011/07/20/on-custard-piety/
How deliciously ironic that the main result of the hacking/blagging furore worked up by the chattering metropolitan left is likely to be not the demise of News International but of the Mirror Group, whose total capitalisation is a mere £140 million. The Mirror Group titles (its share price is down 10pc this week alone) indulged in the practice far more extensively than any other group and when the results of the various inquiries are known it will face hundreds of demands for substantial compensation from the victims sufficient to sink the company. It's known as THE LAW OF UNINTENDED CONSEQUENCES.
Such sincerity. Rupert could play 'Uriah Heap' with absolute conviction.
Rather superfluously, someone pointed out that - if it had gone through, the take-over of BSkyB may have been compromised by a conflict of interest between the Culture Secretary, Jeremy Hunt and Murdoch Senior.
Both have Chinese wives!
Surely this is just coincidence.
David C--opperfield!
I'm sorry to disagree - I don't think Old Murdoch found the pie least bit disconcerting.
Actually, for his purposes, it was perfect. The panel had just tired him and his son out for three hours (his sons technique of trying to run the committee out of time had not worked, they had been dogged, despite some wobbles in the middle).
The whole thing was reaching its painfully drawn out but finally effective seeming crescendo as a sharp young woman was launching her attack (and we know he has a weakness for the type, as his wife (and Brooks) prove). The team Murdoch was visibly starting to lag.
Then splash - slap - hurrah! - a pie relief moment! Welcome injection of adrealine...
His wife has become a bit of a hero, the attacker looks more like a tw*t than some green custard lady ever did, and everyone is all of a sudden, "ooh, mr Murdoch, are you okay? We're so so sorry, you have been so accomodating in coming (!), and now this, we're so embarrased...You're so so GRACIOUS..."
I mean, where was that coming from???
Mostly recipients of the pie salutation don't get such a wave of sympathy!
The man's granpa super tycoon mojo had clearly been casting a subtle spell despite at times tough questioning.
So, the young lady asked her questions, pretending to be as tough as she would have been, everyone had bit of a laugh. The hard, driving momentum was lost.
Old Rupe even got to read the statement he had prepared that had first been refused. As a kind of an apology.
And the timing of was more perfect than it would have been, read at the start in front of a panel preparing to fight.
Now, he said his PR sound bite bit to mostly sympathetic audience, while his heroic wife spledid in pink in the background.
(As it turned out - he mostly had been able to work the contents into his replies, so like a skilled journo, he was the only one who got to say his points twice)
Humble pie? I don't think so. A lucky slapstick interval more like it. And the old fox knew it.
His readers will lap it up. They might even start liking him again.
What's a bit of foam for a tough old Aussie guy in exchange for that?
All eyes on the pies.
Ignore the years we have suffered at the hands of his newspapers, how it has corrupted our politics, robbed people of their private lives, cast a shadow over the integrity of private individuals. Yeah, lets just hear about the pie.
The guy who threw it is a joke and the fact all reporters are now talking about it shows just how pathetic our journalists are.
I have no interest in who threw what, I am only interested in the answers given and questions ignored/dodged. Please, shut up about the plate of shaving foam.
Ignore all wrong doing, keep your eyes on the pies!
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