Boris's expenses gibe at Cameron

London mayor mocks Cameron's claim for wisteria trimming

Channel 4 has just launched a smart new website on political cliques, Who Knows Who, to tie in with its screening of When Boris Met Dave on Saturday.

The site offers perhaps the fullest guide yet to the former members of the Bullingdon Club, whose idea of a fun night out was memorably described by Evelyn Waugh as beating foxes with champagne bottles.

The Boris/Cameron relationship came under scrutiny again at the Spectator parliamentary awards, where, in his uproarious speech, Lord Mandelson declared that both he and Boris "have an overwhelming ambition to do everything we can to undermine David Cameron".

Now the Guardian's eagle-eyed Simon Hoggart has identified a possible gibe by Boris at Cameron earlier in the afternoon. In his speech, Boris hailed MPs for distracting the public from bankers' extravagant bonuses with their profligate expense claims. He added that, with all the awards they win these days, they would soon need to claim for trophy cabinets on their "additional costs allowance". Indeed, he went on, the cabinets would grow so full that they'd damage walls. MPs would need to buy wisteria plants to cover the unsightly damage.

In an apparently obscure remark, he added: "It would be necessary to add a wisteria trimmer to the bill." The only MP to claim for wisteria trimming? David Cameron.

George Eaton is political editor of the New Statesman.

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Appreciate the full horror of Nigel Farage's pro-Trump speech

The former Ukip leader has appeared at a Donald Trump rally. It went exactly as you would expect.

It is with a heavy heart that I must announce Nigel Farage is at it again.

The on-again, off-again Ukip leader and current Member of the European Parliament has appeared at a Donald Trump rally to lend his support to the presidential candidate.

It was, predictably, distressing.

Farage started by telling his American audience why they, like he, should be positive.

"I come to you from the United Kingdom"

Okay, good start. Undeniably true.

"– with a message of hope –

Again, probably quite true.

Image: Clearly hopeful (Wikipedia Screenshot)

– and optimism.”

Ah.

Image: Nigel Farage in front of a poster showing immigrants who are definitely not European (Getty)

He continues: “If the little people, if the real people–”

Wait, what?

Why is Trump nodding sagely at this?

The little people?

Image: It's a plane with the name Trump on it (Wikimedia Commons)

THE LITTLE PEOPLE?

Image: It's the word Trump on the side of a skyscraper I can't cope with this (Pixel)

THE ONLY LITTLE PERSON CLOSE TO TRUMP IS RIDING A MASSIVE STUFFED LION

Image: I don't even know what to tell you. It's Trump and his wife and a child riding a stuffed lion. 

IN A PENTHOUSE

A PENTHOUSE WHICH LOOKS LIKE LIBERACE WAS LET LOOSE WITH THE GILT ON DAY FIVE OF A PARTICULARLY BAD BENDER

Image: So much gold. Just gold, everywhere.

HIS WIFE HAS SO MANY BAGS SHE HAS TO EMPLOY A BAG MAN TO CARRY THEM

Image: I did not even know there were so many styles of Louis Vuitton, and my dentists has a lot of old copies of Vogue.

Anyway. Back to Farage, who is telling the little people that they can win "against the forces of global corporatism".

 

Image: Aaaaarggghhhh (Wikipedia Screenshot)

Ugh. Okay. What next? Oh god, he's telling them they can have a Brexit moment.

“... you can beat Washington...”

“... if enough decent people...”

“...are prepared to stand up against the establishment”

Image: A screenshot from Donald Trump's Wikipedia page.

I think I need a lie down.

Watch the full clip here:

Stephanie Boland is digital assistant at the New Statesman. She tweets at @stephanieboland