Something for the weekend: Pandemic 2

This week Iain Simons reviews one game that should appeal to those with a taste for the morbid...

For those who enjoy strategic simulation games but dislike the company of others, this week we present Pandemic 2 for your delight and amusement. The sequel to Pandemic (who would have thought global devastation could be developed into a franchise…?) this challenges you to create the ultimate disease, infecting and killing the population of Earth. It’s like SimCity for people that hate other people.

Whilst having a simple interface, I’d recommend a watch of the tutorial video to be introduced to the basic concepts. It’s a resource management/ strategy game, where the assets you are juggling are the qualities of your disease. Once you’ve made the decision of what class of infection you are going to create (virus, parasite or bacteria) the core game begins.

Your task is to guide the development of your disease into being the most infectious, lethal strain possible - whilst keeping its visibility to humans and resistance to their vaccines at a maximum. By carefully managing symptoms, transmission methods and resistances, one slowly spreads death throughout the planet. But as borders close and governments order the mass burning of corpses, your function becomes frustratingly spectatorial. It’s morbid fun, but doesn’t offer quite enough feedback in its interface for you to really feel in control of the action. This has no pretensions to being educational, and nor should it, but a little more detail would prove satisfying.

With just functional graphics and an irritating, looping soundtrack (although it can be muted) Pandemic 2 is a fairly lightweight strategy affair. A nice concept needing a rather more finesse, this won’t tax any simulation aficionados but rather provide a gentle diversion, allowing you to while away some time wreaking death upon your fellow man. And what else are Fridays for?

Iain Simons writes, talks and tweets about videogames and technology. His new book, Play Britannia, is to be published in 2009. He is the director of the GameCity festival at Nottingham Trent University.
Getty
Show Hide image

Commons Confidential: Sleepy Zac is too laid-back

Lucy Allan's "threat", Clean for the Queen and the case of the invisible frontbencher.

After six years as a minister for Europe, David Lidington’s profile remains low. But the invisible frontbencher might be useful in a pub quiz, if not a referendum. A Tory snout muttered that David Who? has been boasting that he can name 20 of the 28 European commissioners currently parked in Brussels.

Lidington admitted that he will be history, should the UK decide to quit the EU. “If Britain voted to leave,” he nervously told a Tory gathering, “I think I’d let somebody else have a go in this job.” David Cameron is presumably thinking the same thing. Incidentally, can anybody name Britain’s EU commissioner?

“I wanted to get in touch to let you know about a fantastic initiative to help clean up the UK in advance of HM the Queen’s 90th birthday,” trilled the Banbury Tory Victoria Prentis in an email to fellow MPs. “‘Clean for the Queen’ brings together all the anti-litter organisations from the UK and aims to get people involved in the largest community-inspired action against litter . . . I will also be holding a drop-in photo opportunity . . . We will have posters, litter bags and T-shirts. Please do come along.” I await the formation of a breakaway group: “Republicans for Rubbish”.

Tory colleagues are advising Zac Goldsmith, I hear, to invest a slice of his inherited £300m fortune in speaking lessons to help him stop sounding so disinterested. Laid-Back Zac appears to lull himself to sleep on public platforms and on TV. My informant whispered that cheeky Tory MPs have been cooking up a slogan – “Goldsmith: head and shoulders above Labour” – ahead of the tall, rich kid’s tussle with the pocket battleship Sadiq Khan to become the mayor of London.

The Telford Tory Lucy Allan has finally received help after inserting the words “Unless you die” into a constituent’s email that she posted on Facebook, presumably to present herself as the victim of a non-existent death threat. Allan has since become embroiled in accusations of bullying a sick staffer. “The House has offered me a three-hour media training session,” the fantasist said in an email to colleagues. “There are two extra slots available . . .” How much will this cost us?

Oh, to have been a fly on the wall when the Injustice Secretary, Michael Gove, shared a drink with Chris Grayling and informed his predecessor that prisons would be the next piece of his legacy to be reversed. Chris “the Jackal” Grayling, by the way, is complaining that Gove’s spads are rubbishing him. And with good reason.

The Tory lobbyist Baron Hill of Oareford is the UK’s chap at the European Commission. He puts the margin into marginalised at the Berlaymont.

Kevin Maguire is the associate editor (politics) of the Daily Mirror

Kevin Maguire is Associate Editor (Politics) on the Daily Mirror and author of our Commons Confidential column on the high politics and low life in Westminster. An award-winning journalist, he is in frequent demand on television and radio and co-authored a book on great parliamentary scandals. He was formerly Chief Reporter on the Guardian and Labour Correspondent on the Daily Telegraph.

This article first appeared in the 11 January 2016 issue of the New Statesman, The legacy of Europe's worst battle