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London's loss, Caracas' gain

  • Posted by Simon Hooper
  • 29 August 2008

Ditched by Londoners, it's nice to know that someone stands to benefit from Ken's years of experience in City Hall

With his successor doing his bit for Anglo-Chinese relations with his flag-waving "ping pong's coming home" performance in Beijing last weekend, it's nice to see Ken Livingstone back in work this week as a consultant to his old friend Hugo Chavez. London, it seems, is just not big enough for these larger than life political characters.

Apparently Livingstone's brief is to get Caracas moving. Having visited the Venezuelan capital a couple of times myself, I can say that as a regular Tube traveller Ken should at least find the underground system to his satisfaction. Speedy and reliable, cheap and clean, the Caracas metro is among the best in the world; its air conditioned platforms just about the only place in the city you can find any peace and quiet. It was built by the French, of course.

Above ground though, it's a different story. Traffic gridlock, brash unsightly skyscrapers and a headache-inducing haze are the inevitable consequences of a society in which oil is cheaper than water and the automobile has ruled unchecked for decades. Much of the centre of the city was hollowed out to make way for US-style freeways and flyovers – now crumbling – during the last oil boom of the 1970s. Trying to ban Chelsea tractors was one thing; attempting to introduce a congestion zone in Caracas would be like trying to persuade lions of the merits of vegetarianism.

Despite its numerous other achievements, Chavista socialism meanwhile has so far made little progress towards getting the majority of residences out of the barrios that suffocate the city on all sides and into proper housing (though Ken, in one of his redder moments, will surely have privately enjoyed the decision a couple of years ago by the mayor of Caracas to appropriate a couple of private golf clubs to create additional living space). Caracas residents continue to endure levels of violent crime that make South London's knife crisis look like an episode of Trumpton.

All of which means that Ken has his work cut out - but it's nice to know that someone stands to benefit from all those years of experience at the GLC and in City Hall. It's a wonder he still has time for his own radio show. Let's hope he hasn't been taking broadcasting tips from Chavez, whose own radio and TV broadcasts have been known to run into hours and days...

An unusually tanned and relaxed Ben returns from his summer holidays - if those are the right words to describe Scotland in August - next week.

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3 comments from readers

knave
31 August 2008 at 17:35

Simon when is Ben back, and then you can go back to neo con clone school, the wonderful Nick Cohen High.

Remember

Lesson 1 : A 100 reasons to hate Red Ken. This is your homework

Lesson 2 ; Chavaz is an evil Commie and should be nailed to a cross by one of the visiting Columbian hilltop battalion.

Lesson 3 ; Brown is a leftie scumbag who is going to be replaced by the nice Mr Cameron. Quite right too.

Your tutor Housemaster Bright, tells me you are becoming an A grade student and especially excel at “the collected speeches of Boris”

I have two packets of political periodical.

The new improved Alton led bio neo con NS or the regular Spectator.

Can you tell the difference ?

We can’t

Vera
04 September 2008 at 05:14

Like Red Ken, going Crackers with the loony in Caracas, Ms. Booth is another brave activist, any chance of the Gaza becoming her permament address? A brave elderly Ozzie teacher who actually went to Gaza to do something important the other year was kidnapped. The Israelis gave her refuge on release.

antileft
06 September 2008 at 18:09

Knave, do something else. You dont know the first thing about venezuela- dont pretend to. Just recently you were telling me how "chavez lowered the murder rate in colombia". Idiot. And the murder rate in venezuela? You have no idea at all, do you.

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