The uncomfortable truth: why do more men than women commit suicide?

The hangover of the "stiff upper lip" years leads directly and frighteningly to the deaths of hundreds of men in the UK. What can we do about it?

 

In 1997, a book by Marc Etkind called ...Or Not To Be: A Collection of Suicide Notes enjoyed quiet but firm success: quiet, because the buyers themselves often expressed feeling "uncomfortably morbid" about its purchase, even when they left online reviews; firm, because apparently this sort of morbid voyeurism is part and parcel of human nature. Staunch belief in this ubiquitous enjoyment of the gruesome and tragic is presumably why the book’s own editor referred to its content as "pornography".

But there are other reasons why people might have clamoured for the contents of Kurt Cobain’s last adieu to the world, or Sylvia Plath’s final explanation for a life of steady masochistic decline. Suicide is one of the most frightening and persistent occurrences in the world. It goes against everything we know about biology and those "natural" instincts which are apparently programmed towards survival. Its continued appearance across all strata of our own society, and all societies resident on our planet, utterly destroys the idea that we can ever centrally control, provide or quantify happiness. We might see patterns in suicidal behaviour periodically emerge - the dramatic spike in people taking their lives in the UK and US during the recession, for instance, certainly indicates a connection with financial hardship - but many, many suicides remain inexplicable. An extremely common response amongst family members who have lost loved ones to suicide is, "I don’t understand why". And so this undeniable interest in the suicide notes of others - those prized letters which, statistically, are hardly ever left - can be seen as a collective exercise in self-protection as well as straightforward morbidity. Reading the notes of others might arm us with some preventative measures, we reason. It might elucidate the mechanics of human drives turning in on themselves. It might even help us to eventually purge suicide from our global community altogether. 

That’s exactly what a research team at Cincinnati Children’s Hospital had in mind when they compiled "the world’s largest collection of suicide notes" and released the news to the North American media last month. One man, a professor of paediatrics called John Pestion, claimed in USA Today to have read all 1,300 of them in his quest to produce tools for diagnosing an individual’s true suicide risk. Whether the team will be successful remains to be seen, but for western societies, the issue is pressing. According to ONS, suicide is now the single biggest killer of young men in England and Wales; in recent years, it has more than once outstripped the number of deaths from road traffic accidents and assault combined.

Which brings us to the uncomfortable truth: that suicide has a clear gender bias. It is an event with a male face, although the specific affliction behind it is murkier. There are certain populations which suffer from the highest rates of all, such as prisoners and those from lower socioeconomic backgrounds. "But what exactly do we achieve when we shift our focus to these?" says Jane Powell, head of the male suicide prevention charity Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM.) "The simple, numerical fact of the matter is that men are dying by their own hand far more than women. We need to tackle that immediately."

Jane Powell is a practical woman with a practical viewpoint. She was brought in as a freelancer to develop an anti-suicide pilot project for men in Manchester in 1997; she had no personal connection with suicide, but the issue quickly became her vocation. When she was asked to wind the pilot up, she decided to develop CALM into a fully fledged independent national charity instead. And she sees nothing strange in the idea of a woman heading up a charity that specifically targets male suicide: the numbers and the people spoke for themselves, she says, and she was in the right place at the right time. She wasn’t willing to walk away.

In many ways, an increased risk of suicide for men can be seen as that old foe, the patriarchy, backfiring on itself. Rigid binary structures of gender have led to a cultural expectation that men won’t voice depressive feelings or problems with anxiety, preferring instead to suffer in silence until the suffering becomes unbearable and they remove themselves resignedly from the fold. This conflation of emotional turmoil with weakness combines toxically with social stigma surrounding mental health. Often, the idea of a psychiatric visit literally becomes a fate worse than death.

"Men don’t want a diagnosis or an introduction to the mental health system," says Powell, simply, "so what’s the point in campaigning to get them to accept a label? In the here and now, we provide initiatives that acknowledge and normalise depressive feelings in men. We point them towards our helpline. We don’t insist that the man in question has to see his GP. We address the suicidal urge without implying that we might introduce him to a world of further prejudice; that’s how we prevent a man from killing himself. Of course we work to break down destructive expectations about traditional masculinity - but we’re pragmatic when someone is in the throes of a suicidal episode." In other words, she picks her battles.

Feminism, Powell believes, has progressed massively in terms of female expression in the last 40 years - she personally recalls once being refused a job for wearing trousers. Assertiveness is now a virtue for the "career woman" rather than a perversion of the "sweet, meek" housewife - and, indeed, trouser suits are the norm - but the parameters of the male identity have remained comparatively narrow. This blinding hangover of the "stiff upper lip" years leads directly and frighteningly to the deaths of hundreds of men in the UK (a number that, according to Powell, is climbing in certain age ranges.) While Powell might see this as feminism forgetting her brothers, however, it seems more likely that "male" attributes, with all their attached prestige, are easier to assimilate than those "female" ones which stink of instability and inferiority.

Whatever the reason, people die. And initiatives like CALM - which attempt to frame suicide as something that ‘everyone considers’ rather than a thought which, when voiced, could lead you straight into a hospital bed - are making practical differences. Young male suicide rates during their years of operation have dropped by 55 per cent in Merseyside alone. Discussions about mental health stigma and sexism desperately need to be further explored, but the technique over at CALM is working, and it’s working in difficult conditions. The general erosion of gender barriers, however, must be a society-wide effort - and until it is, Powell believes that we will continue to lose men in their droves.

Interestingly, the suicide note itself is one of the only aspects of the act which seems entirely isolated from the sex of the deceased. Men and women are equally likely (or unlikely) to leave behind written accompaniments to their untimely shuffling off the mortal coil - which range from the outright harrowing to such dark comedy as George Eastman’s "Dear friends: my work is done. Why wait?" Faced with the numbers, addressing suicide seems daunting - but a lot can be done through the day-to-day challenging of gender expectations. 

Because, ultimately, we all have a responsibility to give those like Eastman a reason for the waiting.

If any of the content of this story affects you, the Samaritans are available to talk 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.

Kurt Cobain in 1993. Photograph: Getty Images
Holly Baxter is a freelance journalist who writes regularly for The Guardian and The New Statesman. She is also one half of The Vagenda and releases a book on the media in May 2014.
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Labour's establishment suspects a Momentum conspiracy - they're right

Bernie Sanders-style organisers are determined to rewire the party's machine.  

If you wanted to understand the basic dynamics of this year’s Labour leadership contest, Brighton and Hove District Labour Party is a good microcosm. On Saturday 9 July, a day before Angela Eagle was to announce her leadership bid, hundreds of members flooded into its AGM. Despite the room having a capacity of over 250, the meeting had to be held in three batches, with members forming an orderly queue. The result of the massive turnout was clear in political terms – pro-Corbyn candidates won every position on the local executive committee. 

Many in the room hailed the turnout and the result. But others claimed that some in the crowd had engaged in abuse and harassment.The national party decided that, rather than first investigate individuals, it would suspend Brighton and Hove. Add this to the national ban on local meetings and events during the leadership election, and it is easy to see why Labour seems to have an uneasy relationship with mass politics. To put it a less neutral way, the party machine is in a state of open warfare against Corbyn and his supporters.

Brighton and Hove illustrates how local activists have continued to organise – in an even more innovative and effective way than before. On Thursday 21 July, the week following the CLP’s suspension, the local Momentum group organised a mass meeting. More than 200 people showed up, with the mood defiant and pumped up.  Rather than listen to speeches, the room then became a road test for a new "campaign meetup", a more modestly titled version of the "barnstorms" used by the Bernie Sanders campaign. Activists broke up into small groups to discuss the strategy of the campaign and then even smaller groups to organise action on a very local level. By the end of the night, 20 phonebanking sessions had been planned at a branch level over the following week. 

In the past, organising inside the Labour Party was seen as a slightly cloak and dagger affair. When the Labour Party bureaucracy expelled leftwing activists in past decades, many on went further underground, organising in semi-secrecy. Now, Momentum is doing the exact opposite. 

The emphasis of the Corbyn campaign is on making its strategy, volunteer hubs and events listings as open and accessible as possible. Interactive maps will allow local activists to advertise hundreds of events, and then contact people in their area. When they gather to phonebank in they will be using a custom-built web app which will enable tens of thousands of callers to ring hundreds of thousands of numbers, from wherever they are.

As Momentum has learned to its cost, there is a trade-off between a campaign’s openness and its ability to stage manage events. But in the new politics of the Labour party, in which both the numbers of interested people and the capacity to connect with them directly are increasing exponentially, there is simply no contest. In order to win the next general election, Labour will have to master these tactics on a much bigger scale. The leadership election is the road test. 

Even many moderates seem to accept that the days of simply triangulating towards the centre and getting cozy with the Murdoch press are over. Labour needs to reach people and communities directly with an ambitious digital strategy and an army of self-organising activists. It is this kind of mass politics that delivered a "no" vote in Greece’s referendum on the terms of the Eurozone bailout last summer – defying pretty much the whole of the media, business and political establishment. 

The problem for Corbyn's challenger, Owen Smith, is that many of his backers have an open problem with this type of mass politics. Rather than investigate allegations of abuse, they have supported the suspension of CLPs. Rather than seeing the heightened emotions that come with mass mobilisations as side-effects which needs to be controlled, they have sought to joins unconnected acts of harassment, in order to smear Jeremy Corbyn. The MP Ben Bradshaw has even seemed to accuse Momentum of organising a conspiracy to physically attack Labour MPs.

The real conspiracy is much bigger than that. Hundreds of thousands of people are arriving, enthusiastic and determined, into the Labour party. These people, and their ability to convince the communities of which they are a part, threaten Britain’s political equilibrium, both the Conservatives and the Labour establishment. When the greatest hope for Labour becomes your greatest nightmare, you have good call to feel alarmed.