1. Gone west
A homing pigeon's navigation went awry when, instead of heading home to Hadston, Northumberland, it flew to the Caribbean island of St Eustatius. The owner, John Stewart, said: "I'm glad she's safe and in good hands - probably having a lovely time . . . I'm quite jealous, really."
2. Inappropriate language
A construction firm working on an Aberdeenshire bridge promised to replace a bilingual road sign that was baffling locals. The English part was fine, but as Brian Adam, the local MSP, observed, "It doesn't matter how wonderful the Welsh language is, it's not appropriate for this part of Scotland."
3. Scary cats
A gardener splashed out £240 on a year's supply of horticultural "black gold" after Chessington World of Adventures auctioned all the manure its two Sumatran tigers can produce on eBay. The dung is said to frighten off cats and foxes.
4. Wrong trousers
A Berlin shoplifter who stole a new outfit but accidentally picked up two shoes of different sizes was arrested when he returned to the shop a couple of days later to make good his mistake. Staff had no trouble spotting him because he was wearing the stolen clothes.
5. Down, Billy!
A Swiss man caught speeding in Ontario told police that he was taking advantage of "the ability to go faster without hitting a goat". Joel Doiron, a police spokesman, remarked: "I've never been to Switzerland but I guess there must be a lot of goats there."
