Set by Will Bellenger: We asked for inappropriate reworkings of the monikers of the famous
I was exposed to Anne Du Croz's split personality this week: the half that "gets" the rules and the half that doesn't. The anagrams were supposed to be inappropriate in the sense that they would never be applied to the provider of the letters. What am I to make of "Prince of Wales - ESP owl fancier" and "Harry Wales - always Herr"? Both are absolutely spot on. Actually, there were others just as bad (John O'Byrne's "Tony Blair - Tory in lab", for example). I put it down to the summer heat: you're all so full of food and sun and wine that you're just sending in any old stuff as long as it's funny and bugger the consequences. Welcome to: Janet Hicks, Susanne Fletcher, Keith Strachan, Elizabeth Sourbut, Douglas Frank Crosby, Matt Niven, Jay Shuck, Sylvia Betts and Diane Crimes. £5 tokens to every single- and doubleton, £10 to David Bibby, £15 to Anne Du Croz. The Tesco vouchers go to Ian Birchall for sheer wickedness.
Fair shares for all
Her Majesty - share my jet
Osama Bin Laden - a lesbian nomad
Bill Oddie - libido led
Alex Ferguson - sex fun galore
David Attenborough - an odd, abortive thug
Rebekah Wade - had weak beer
Andy Marr - randy ram
Jeremy Paxman - pyjama-men rex
Anne Du Croz
Modest aims
Heather Mills - I'll share them
Ian Birchall
Out of tune
Tina Turner - turn tin ear
Bob Dylan - bland boy
G M Davis
Godlike leader
(James) Gordon Brown - newborn's major god
Patricia Hewitt - a pithier wit act
Shirley Curran
Look out, Phil!
Dr Rowan Williams - will ram a Windsor
John O'Byrne
Oh God . . .
Peter Hain - ah, I repent!
Graham Greene - a German Hergé
W J Webster
Eggsactly famous
Edwina Currie - I incurred awe
Susanne Fletcher
Getting past it
Julia Roberts - just a broiler
D A Prince
Snails good for soil
Alan Titchmarsh - charm that snail
Connie Bowman
Male breasts so last year
Mel Gibson - big melons
Simon Cowell - mellow icons
Homer Simpson - posh misnomer
David Bibby
No class at all
Noam Chomsky - shaky, common
Peter Mandelson - lamented person
Sara Spain
No 3936 Prize worthy
Set by Hank T Romein
Nobel, Pulitzer, Olivier . . . Sooner or later, the great, the good and the merely loaded have prizes named after them. For what qualities or achievements might one, at some future date, win the Bragg, the Archer, the Prescott, or others of your own devising?
Max 150 words by 29 June
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