After all the unwelcome attention for the book and film of The Da Vinci Code, it seems that the Roman Catholic Church is keen to vamp up its media image. This autumn brings the release of a DVD featuring Pope John Paul II preaching messages of love and hope to the faithful. Nothing strange there - the Vatican has an army of clerical A&R men, from a company called St Paul Multimedia, responsible for making devotional records. But this latest venture is more daring than usual. The Curia has officially sanctioned the avant-garde British film and TV composer Simon Boswell for the project. He's written a remarkably modern score: soaring orchestras, world-music inserts and house-music-style anthems play over trancey, trippy images of the late pope. It looks rather like an acid house video.

Channel 4's latest venture, Fame Asylum, looks set to push the boundaries of reality TV. Cameras will follow a boy band composed entirely of asylum-seekers as they attempt to make it big in the music business. The Refugee Council is supporting the project, brainchild of the performance artist Richard Domenici. The band will make their first public appearance at the Celebrating Sanctuary festival on London's South Bank later this month. I'm assured that the show will not require viewers to vote on whether or not the contestants should be deported.

Still no one to take over from on Desert Island Discs. My man in Broadcasting House tells me that Andrew Marr - initially a favourite for the berth - is not in the running. Neither is Trevor MacDonald. In fact, the list is dominated by women. Another supposed favourite, Martha Kearney, is said to be in with a slim chance - but the smart money is on Sue MacGregor.

Warner Classics, the label that boasts Daniel Barenboim among its artists, is winding up after the departure of its director Matthew Cosgrove. Barenboim, who was recently appointed principal guest conductor at La Scala in Milan, is said to be "upset" and "angry"about the decision. The word is that he may follow Cosgrove on to the prestigious Deutsche Grammophon label.

Everyone is queueing up to adapt Londonstani, the Financial Times journalist Gautam Malkani's punchy and well-received first novel about Asian youths in Hounslow. Every major independent television company in town has made an offer to buy the rights, but the author has apparently held firm. His agent, Katie Haines, says Malkani is "holding out at the moment" - I'm told for the big screen.

Channel 5's recent profile of John Osborne reported that his fellow villagers in Clun, Shropshire, waxed lyrical about the irascible playwright. Unfortunately, this is absolute rubbish. I grew up in Clun and can report that Osborne and his fifth wife, Helen, showed zero interest in village life. On the one occasion they got involved in local politics, they tried to stop a cricket team playing at the bottom of their garden because of the noise.

bendowell@btinternet.com

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