Competition

Competition No 3861

Set by Geoff Horton, 6 December

You were asked for amended sayings.

Report by Ms de Meaner

It's the end-of-term results. But this time, Bill Greenwell (or his former persona Will Bellenger) is not at the top. Well done, David Silverman, our saviour. In addition, we keep on record those who just made it into the top 30 in previous years (shown in italics). In 2004, M E Ault, Bruce W Alter, Keith Norman, Nicholas Hodgson, Margaret Rogers, Watson Weeks, Prue Sheldon, Paul McCann, Gerard Benson and Petrina Stevens fell below the line. A £5 book token per entrant, the best of whom (Ian Birchall) gets the Tesco vouchers.

A cat may look at Tony Blair.

George Cowley

Too many cooks make television programmes.

It's a short road that has no Starbucks.

Sue May

Whom the gods would destroy, they first make celebrities.

Keith Norman

It's a wise child that knows its own father's Pin number.

J Seery

Those whom the gods would destroy, they first invite to a Spectator party.

Anne Du Croz

There's safety in numbers, but only if you remember the combination.

Cathy Benson

Many hands make big horses.

R J Pickles

Give a dog a bad name and you'll be too embarrassed to call it.

W J Webster

Frome wasn't built in a day.

Derek Morgan

It's a short road that has no hidden speed cameras.

David Silverman

Look before you invade.

It's a wise child that knows who the Home Secretary is.

Ian Birchall

Everyone can be squeamish for 15 minutes.

John Griffiths-Colby

You scratch my BMW and I'll scratch yours.

John Somers

Murdoch most foul . . .

Ron Rubin

No 3864 Set by Bazza

"It is not out of the question that Jane Austen ran a brothel," wrote Terry Eagleton in the NS. We want extracts from biographies that spring an equivalent surprise.

Max 175 words by 20 January. E-mail: comp@ newstatesman.co.uk An obituary of John Marriott will appear next week.