Competition No 3751
Set by Brendan J O'Byrne on 30 September
We asked you to take a well-known prefix and add it to a well-known ism to make a new word.
Report by Ms de Meaner
I'm afraid I saw so many posts (letters), polys (parrots), autos (cars) and semis (houses) that only The Very Best got in. £10 for the winners, £5 for the singletons. Top dog David Silverman also gets the vouchers.
Post-agnosticism: The belief, common among many modern employees of Royal Mail, that it is not possible to know through which specific door to deliver any given letter, as an address, postcode and door number per se do not constitute sufficient objective evidence. This is even more the case with postcards, which may never be delivered to their intended destination, thus giving rise to doubts of their very existence.
Post-realism: Face it, there's no way that letter will be delivered the next day.
Post-surrealism: A letter box in the shape of a burning giraffe.
Post-autism: Lining up stamps.
David Silverman
Pan-Thatcherism: Right-wing policies so extreme as to be in the realm of fantasy.
Sado-socialism: When you are a member of the Labour Party but it hurts.
Stephen Bibby
Arch-triumphalism: possessing a larger and more verdant pergola than your neighbours'.
Post-socialism: reading other people's mail.
Paul Brummell
Semi-optimism: Living happily in the suburbs.
Basil Ransome-Davies
Ante-bagism-shagism-dragism-madism-ragism-tagism-thisism-thatism-ismism: All we are saying is that John Lennon was never as good on his own as he was with the Beatles.
Andrew Jackson
Extra-materialism: when you are thrilled to be able to get into an M&S size 14.
Anne Du Croz
Counter-imperialism: the banning of mints.
Sid Field
Contra-Marxism: meddling with A-level results.
Semi-capitalism: Economic system that keeps house prices up.
Poly-witticism: An amusing parrot.
John O'Byrne
Ortho-heroism: Smiling through root canal work.
Counter-romanticism: Slapping your four-year affair between hard covers for the autumn book sales.
Ego-formalism: Refusing to reply unless addressed as sir or madam.
D A Prince
Retro-vandalism: Graffiti by dyslexics.
Mini-sexism: harassment or exploitation in a small car.
Post-scepticism: lack of faith in Consignia.
Keith Norman
Semi-absenteeism: Being away from home.
Aero-epicureanism: A liking for chocolate.
Michael Cregan
Counter-terrorism: Traditional teaching of numeracy to the young.
David Wedmore
No 3754 Set by Stephen Hackett
John Sutherland wrote in the Guardian: "The London Review of Books is a journal so highbrow that you expect to have to pass a test before being allowed to read it . . ." We want (amusing) questions for such a test or questions for other magazines, say Horse & Hound, Erotic Review, Spectator . . . ?
Max ten questions by 1 November (to appear in issue dated 11 November). E-mail: comp@newstatesman.co.uk
