Nato's Article 5, which declares that an injury to one member is an injury to all, was swiftly invoked after the attack on America. The less well-known Article 6, which decrees that Lord Robertson is not at home for hostilities during the weekend, is also operational. Nato's general secretary, usually keen to ply Washington's line on any programme anywhere, has turned down broadcasting invitations three weekends in a row. Interesting to note, also, that General Musharraf, who was referred to as the military dictator of Pakistan after seizing power from an elected government, is now universally described as the president. He was trained at Sandhurst. Is that what they teach them?

A new book aimed at cheering up the nation asks prominent people to say how they would make Britain a better place. Lord Tebbit suggests that the country's population should be reduced by five million. He doesn't say which five million, but we can hazard a guess.

The Today programme's resident Blairite mouthpiece, Fraser Kemp MP, is back - to the chagrin of his understudy, Stephen Pound MP. Kemp had disappeared after the election, when he moved from the back benches to the whips' office. But the chief whip, Hilary Armstrong, has agreed to let whips appear on radio and television, a serious break with the tradition of omerta. Sources insist that Kemp originally set his sights on being sports minister, but John Prescott laid claim to that little goodie for his mate Paddington Bear, aka Dick Caborn. Poor old bear is now the butt of the sports-writing establishment, which should guarantee his position for the rest of the parliament.

An invitation to the launch of Prospect comes through the post. No, not the tedious and self-important magazine, but a union merger of the Engineers and Managers' Association (the old power station managers' outfit, whose members helped bring down Ulster's Sunningdale power-sharing government in 1975) and the government scientists, lPMS. The mania for fancy new names began with Unison, and continues with Amicus, the daft title of the AEEU-MSF merger. Sir Ken Jackson, the engineers' leader, told his people: "It's Latin for comrade." Well, nearly. But that didn't stop the female comrades rejecting the name as sexist.

Jo-Anne Nadler, who must now be promoted as gorgeous and pouting successor to Amanda Platell, had a bit of a run-in at the Tory party conference with Oberleutnant Mike Penning, lain Duncan Smith's spin-doctor. Nadler, the biographer of William Hague, went to a Young Conservatives (I cannot call them Conservative Future) reception - properly invited - and was refused admission by Penning because "she's media". Only Hague's chance arrival restored Nadler's composure and her presence at the ball.

John Mann, the MP who took over from Joe Ashton in Bassetlaw, is having some difficulty explaining the nature of the Jo Moore scandal to his constituents. "They've heard of Demi Moore and Roger Moore and Dudley Moore and Bobby Moore and even Ilkley Moor," he wails. "But Jo Moore has got them beat."

The legendary Chris Moncrieff, political correspondent at large for the Press Association, has written a history of his organisation, Living on a Deadline. It turns out to be mainly autobiography. He was once described by John Major as "a national treasure", and he certainly was treasured by some MPs, even in the days when he was a 16-pints-of-Guinness- a-day man. "He is one of the men that women just love to mother," the book records. I'll say.

Nice to know that Keith Vaz is still being looked after, despite his demotion to the back benches. Walking in St James's Park the other day, my snout noticed the portly ex-Foreign Office minister ahead. Then a large silver Mercedes glided up and swept him off down the Mall.

Paul Routledge is chief political commentator for the Mirror

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