Doubt circulated about whether Michael Portillo still had leadership ambitions. Coronation Street is 40 years old

Don't want to be Ena Sharples

Don't want a role as Raquel

Don't want to be Pope of the oldest of Soap

While William is doing so well

Don't want to be Kenneth Barlow

Don't want to be Curly Watts

Nor the new man who nobbles the king of the cobbles

While William's still calling the shots

Don't want to be Elsie Tanner

Nor the boozers who battened on Bet

Nor wish to be freed like Deirdre Rachid

While William's the star of the set

Don't want to be Annie Walker

Nor Ashley nor Maxine nor Fred

Nor the Kensington crumpet announced by a trumpet

For I'm at the Crossroads instead

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