ITN will restore News at Ten. Sort of. BBC1 has planned to move its newscasts to the same time

We are the News. We are at

Ten (two of us, mostly) but also

at Sixes and Sevens. This is a matter

of Consternation. If we are left

to the Eleventh hour, then we

are far too late. Bong. We must be

right as Ninepins, but Ten to the

dozens (and not Nineteen, unless

we are Four at Seven on the

twenty-four-hour day). If we turn on

a Six, then we are old hatters,

but at Ten, we are on the balls.

Unless there's a Match, when we

wait on the tables. Bong. We have

our backs to the Studio. And now,

over. We are the News. At Eight,

we are ready, naked and waiting

behind your screens for a Flash.

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