British lovers were said to be the best in Europe, averaging 21 minutes a session. Women were said to be fed up with new Labour

You may be stiff as a poker

There may be great strength in your slacks

But if you're a card, it's a joker

Surrounded by clickety claques

Each Harry, each Dick, and each Tom is

A hungry young bucket of lust

But you are a lick and a promise

With a boom that looks ready to bust

You came as the great Casanova

Baring your body and soul

But now that your run-up is over

We doubt we'll be vaulting your poll

So are you our gender's defenders

Or counting your way round the clock?

Or are you the greatest pretenders

And talking a load of old cock?

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