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Worm Perfect

Bill Greenwell

Published 05 June 2000

A French scientist reckons humans have only 28,000 genes, rather than 100,000. This puts them only 9,000 ahead of worms. Gordon Brown accused Oxbridge of elitism

I'm a wonder, you're a worm,

I am off to Magdalen,

I'll be in my second term

While you're down there dagdalen.

You were born to feed the bird,

I was born to culture;

While I'm earning a decent third,

You'll be a garden multure.

Eton has its playing fields,

Monkseaton has its pasture:

I am what true breeding yields,

This year as with lasture.

Yes, I wriggle. Yes, I squirm.

But I was bred for ruling -

For I'm a nicer, pinker worm

And forked out for my schuling.

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